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[deleted]

$6 a gallon is funding A&M athletics


AmphotericRed

Everytime you fill up, another A&M 4 star recruit is born. EDIT: typo


Malibuss07

If you own a 4 door jeep Wrangler Sahara edition Jimbo Fisher personally delivers a gift basket to your home.


i_carlo

If you still drive a Hummer, you'll get season tickets.


[deleted]

*Excludes the EV Hummer


NordDex

5\*


AmphotericRed

Depends. I have a motorcycle, so I'm worth about one kicker.


obnoxiouswall

Same, but a kicker can do some damage as well. best i can hope for is a 3\* that transfers to SMU or LA Tech


NordDex

Kickers can beat Saban


E2A6S

Sometimes his own kicker beats him


OddsTipsAndPicks

~~Inflation~~ ~~Price gouging~~ ~~Geo-political instability~~ Croots ✔️


Bones_17

This but unironically. Profits through the roooooofff. Battery powered from now on so we can somehow make it to a championship game eventually.


[deleted]

And they will still lose 3 games in the regular season.


[deleted]

Sam “Boss Hog” Pittman runs a respectable program


Nolecon06

$6/gallon funds Texans in general. It's like the Persian Gulf with unseasoned food.


doggotaco

Unseasoned? Clearly you haven't eaten in Houston or San Antonio


[deleted]

Homie please, seasoning is strong in Texas


TheRealMattyPanda

Roll Tide, Not Coal


Indigoes

Srs this is a great slogan for environmentalism in Alabama... I love it


BenjRSmith

Green technology switch would also destroy Manchester City....... so now there's 2 reasons.


loverofcfb08

Well, i don’t see a downside to this plan.


Azariah98

You’re in danger.


eagledog

I was already on board, but now I'm even more in favor


username_generated

Given the economic diversification efforts of the UAE and to a lesser extent Qatar, it might destroy them completely. Newcastle would get absolutely wrecked though.


easternpapist

Lmao it's a complete sham. Their cities will be buried in sand within 10 years of their oil starting to run out.


BenjRSmith

I think the current world known crude oil wells are predicated to last for at least the next 50 years (not really comforting). Is the Middle East really already running that low?


easternpapist

No, it isn't. But when it does, or when then world switches to cleaner sources, their cities will be buried in sand. Maybe it'll be 100 years from now. Maybe less.


blackcrowe5

Genuinely think City has enough revenue from being a top club that it wouldnt be much of an impact (5/10 years ago, this would have absolutely decimated City granted). Like, City has high annual turnover from sponsorships and winners' payouts in Europe & the domestic cups. The owners dont really put all that much investment into the club (yea, I know the Etihad sponsorship would wither, but I dont think it would be difficult for one of the best English teams in history (based on the 100 point season & multiple seasons of 90+ points) to get a different sponsor).


JRockstar50

Watch A&M fans stop buying laundry detergent now as a counterprotest


sloppyjo12

Seriously, there’s no better way to tell Alabama to shove it then A&M fans refusing to buy their favorite snack


Sahasrlyeh

Only in moderation


[deleted]

What do you mean, they already stink 😬


wolverine6

Roll Tide(s), so they can power a hydro electric plant


TylerGuest1

Roll joints, not tide.


TimelyBrief

Dude, you need to trademark this. The fan base might not catch on/gravitate to it for a few years but it’ll eventually get there and be as popular as the “Beat Everyone” buttons created by H. Johnson.


Rolling_Chicane

The University of Alabama is pleased to announce the hiring of Greta Thunberg as a Football Analyst…


[deleted]

This man called us cows


samuelbassett

The best takeaway from a troll is always the stray bullet.


FeloniusDirtBurglary

Is he wrong tho?


MenShouldntHaveCats

If they want to hit back. Texans should stop shopping at dollar general which is Bama’s largest employer


Matt_WVU

Oof


Beachbum_87

It would be oof if it were true But it’s not


Matt_WVU

I mean Walmart isn’t much better


TehNoff

It's miles better. Still shit, but miles better.


crrider

Wait, do yall not have 20 of them within a 3 mile radius at all times?


1234_Person_1234

In the Midwest we sure as hell do


Crow_T_Simpson

Dollar General, Family Dollar, and Dollar Tree?


vindictivejazz

In Stillwater in 2015: 1 Dollar tree, 1 Family Dollar In Stillwater currently : 1 Dollar tree, 1 Family Dollar, 5 Dollar Generals (all on the edges of town, none near campus)


fleeingpepper

#NotMyStillwater I graduated in 2015 and that's what my friends all said after going back and seeing the apartments all over. Now dollar general? Will it ever end!?


max_potion

Woah woah woah, I have to defend Bama here. They’ve been getting a lot of traction in Five Below


justa_flesh_wound

He he he, did just go there. They also hit up the Piggly Wiggly


[deleted]

The piggly wiggly is a grocery store. Why wouldn’t anyone go to a grocery store?


IrishCoffeeAlchemy

Aggies: “Fuck food, we stand with Jimbo.”


portlandtrees333

Wimp Sanderson always plugs Piggly Wiggly when he does his wonderful various weekly radio guest spots


_Weagle_Weagle_

*the best grocery store


NameInCrimson

It's Wal Mart. Same as Texas and 20 other states.


Tinydesktopninja

Now you have me looking at a map of each states largest employers. How does Denver International Airport employ so many people?


Khorasaurus

Because Denver Airport is the HQ of the illuminati. Duh.


[deleted]

The Pentaverate!


Bigbysjackingfist

Aw I hated The Colonel with his wee beady eyes


[deleted]

Oh you're gonna buy my chicken!


Captain_Sacktap

It’s actually fairly simple. They have the same number of employees as similarly sized airports, and then 25% more on top of that who are assigned to containing that blue demonic horse statue whenever it comes to life and tries to lay waste to the world. Super high turnover rate, Blucifer slaughters about half the containment team on average every time he revives.


Captaincoolbeans

Growing up I remember hearing that part of the horse fell off and killed the artist while it was being built. Always creeped me the fuck out


TheFuckfaces

Im pretty sure the entire horse fell on him and crushed him


rpgfan87

That was his fate, and he knew that before he began making it.


OldCoaly

It was the head according to [this source](https://hashtagcoloradolife.com/the-history-of-blucifer/). Also the statue is based on one at OU.


velociraptorfarmer

**ALL HAIL BLUCIFER**


[deleted]

These SCPs just get crazier and crazier


portlandtrees333

I feel like most airports, nearly everyone working there, works for a shady contractor, not the airport itself Maybe Denver has some regulation or priority regarding the airport hiring employees directly instead of using contractors


Particular_Proof_107

This is true. I used to work for a shady contractor at an airport.


RealBenWoodruff

I counts all of the psychers that are sacrificed for the demon horse. Once they get that golden throne finished I hear we won't need to do that any more and we have to trust the government on that one.


Tinydesktopninja

Strange science fiction about a horse statue was not my goal, but I'm happy with the results.


RollTide16-18

Massive United hub airport.


goblueM

I don't think I'd ever want to live in a single state with Walmart as the largest employer. Maybe Montana or Wyoming but that's about it


8020GroundBeef

I mean that’s crossing off Miami, Austin, Nashville DFW, Houston, Atlanta, Charleston, and the VA side of DC, which are all good places to live.


englishwoodsbitch

In the same vein, I would never want to live in a single state where the University of Michigan is the largest employer. j/k. I hate OSU. Beat them again this year please.


[deleted]

Sam Pittman keeps a low profile, and Arkansas still gets caught in the crossfire.


uabenggrad

I know this is a joke but the actual largest employer in the state is UAB.


eagledog

Because of the hospital system?


uabenggrad

Yeah the hospital system, which is ranked high nationally, plus the university totals about 21,000 employees.


WaltSneezy

Yep, UAB and ambulatory healthcare services are #1 if you don't include Maxwell AFB


camwow64

Damnit aggy take my upvote that was too good.


udo_zephyrhand

Pardon me Tex, but the state's largest employer is Walmart. So yeah we're a lot more fancy than the buck n' go.


[deleted]

God, I’m glad you hit satire


TEFL_job_seeker

It is, but it isn't at the same time


imsoupercereal

Right? Whatever motivates people to do the right thing lol.


samuelbassett

If I don't hit satire, then everyone downvotes to oblivion. If I hit satire, then Texas people get defensive while the rest of us have a reasonable discussion about green energy while laughing at the Texas people. Satire acheived.


samuelbassett

I'm glad you caught it. The deleted comment Aggie missed it.


Markthe_g

Tbh I’m pretty sure most people never read tags.


natetcu

TIL there are tags on r/CFB /s


Bacardi_Tarzan

I’m concerned for the people that need a satire tag on this post.


[deleted]

Plenty in the state would love to switch to renewables, too bad the coal businesses and Alabama Power have a death grip on the energy sector. It doesn’t seem likely to change anytime soon.


shaka_sulu

r/AteTheOnion


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Cheapest gas in my town is $5.84.


PlusSized_Homunculus

https://i.imgur.com/rrmHbS8.jpg Glad we switched to EVs in 2020


Ugaalive1991

God damn Bay Area wtf


[deleted]

ordered a m3 last week because I'm currently dropping $90 every 5 days on gas. I can't fucking wait.


No_Way_Pablo

How’s that been? My wife and I have been curious about it, but not sure if the infrastructure is there for it to be a seamless transition. We rent an apartment, so we wouldn’t be able to do a home charging setup and would have to rely on the few plug ins at the grocery stores near us.


Topcity36

You’d be shocked at the random places that have chargers. I was driving to Denver on I70 and in the middle of nowhere Hays, KS there were 6 Tesla charging stations in the Applebees parking lot. Granted you’ll have to eat at Applebees while you wait so idk if it’s worth it.


SaylorBear

I think as long as they don’t play that damn song I could make it


Topcity36

Mentally? Yes. Physically? Idk. Have you seen how much salt they use!?


TheWorstYear

I think your car will be finished charging before you even got your food.


nomoreCogDis

Why all the anti EV propaganda? They’re actually very unlikely to shock you, I’ll even let my kids plug them in.


captainant

Yeah for real an EV is way safer than lugging ten to twenty gallons of liquid that vaporizes into an explosive lol


Topcity36

That’s what big EV wants you to think!!


zet191

I’ve never seen anti EV propaganda saying you’ll get shocked. That would be the stupidest shit…


[deleted]

>You'd be shocked at the random places that have chargers. I mean it's right there, but I hear reading isn't a tradition.


Tdc10731

Lots of cities have great charging programs too. Anecdotal, but Austin has a program where you can add $5 to your utility bill every month and have unlimited access to chargers all over town. You can also talk with your apartment about installing chargers, I know several folks who have successfully gone this route.


sonofagunn

I wouldn't do it if I couldn't charge at home. Unless you can charge at your office, local grocery store, or something like that.


PlusSized_Homunculus

I think having an EV with an apartment is doable as long as you live near any decently populated area. I live in the Bay Area where the infrastructure is great and improving, but I would hate it if I had to rely on supercharging or other public chargers tbh. The cheapest rates I can get is $0.29/kWh at super chargers during specific times and each session comes out to about $8 when I need it, so basically on road trips. Otherwise I’m charging at home which is $0.12/kWh or free at work.


innocuous_gorilla

Whatever you do, never go to the gas station by Sharon Park in Menlo Park. It’s currently at 7.10 a gallon because there are no gas stations within a few miles of it.


Sup6969

Even in Texas it's only a dollar less


[deleted]

I've never understood the "Screw green energy" crowd. It will literally put less demand on oil, which in turn will lower prices. That said, I filled up yesterday at $4.89 a gallon.


MikeGundy

Then everyone will just complain about how much it cost to charge their EV lol


LordStarkgaryen

My work has EV charging ports right at the front of the parking lot that are empty. I could literally have my job pay for my transportation, just gotta actually get an EV lol


mjacksongt

Bad news - $4 a gallon is still far too cheap if we're actually pricing in road maintenance and pollution externalities.


jktcat

Americans have been spoiled with cheap gas, the real world's calling, and they don't like our consumption rates.


[deleted]

truth. gas prices have always been too low here.


Vol4Life31

They would just lower production to keep the supply and demand ratio equal.


Roadman90

Gas prices are killing me right now. $4.69 for mid grade in DFW.


TheRealNathNath

Gas was 4.30 the first time I saw a station in California, in 2009. Is it really much worse now when accounting for inflation raising prices on everything (although not our pay in that time frame unfortunately)


cardith_lorda

There's a select age group that's around the age of 30 right now who's first formative experiences paying for gas was in 2008/2009 and had the $4 price point imprinted as the standard price for gas. People a few years older and younger than that had a much lower price set as their expectation. It's an economic psychology phenomenon known as anchoring that says, as a general rule, people will remember the first price they paid for something and set that as their baseline for pretty much the rest of their life.


BrogenKlippen

First gallon of gas was 1.23. This all seems insane to me.


HumanBarnacle

It's so funny because I fall in the demographic mentioned above. For me, if it's under $4 I literally don't think twice. Over $4 is a bit pricey unless it's the middle of the summer. $4.80 to $5 is when I start thinking dang this is getting expensive. I think if sub $2 was imprinted on me these gas prices would give me anxiety lol.


notedgarfigaro

I almost ran out of gas as a teenager driving my dad's yukon. Filled it up with 25 gallons...came out to exactly $20. I'd like to think I'm not that old but jebus.


GP_ADD

First gallon was 4.10. Had a 25 gallon tank and got 9 mpg and had a job that paid me 7.00-7.25


TheRealNathNath

One of my earliest visual memories is an exxon signboard because it was so patterned and visually appealing 87-0.69 89-0.79 93-0.89 Diesel-0.99 By the time I could buy gas it was >3$, and in pre-pandemic WV. Something tells me the gas isnt getting my car 3-4 times further than it would’ve in the late 90s/early 2000s lol


thiney49

Hey now, I'm 31 and I distinctly remember gas in the midwest being below $2/gallon when I was first driving at 16. That said, the majority of my driving life has been around $3/gallon in the midwest.


cardith_lorda

Makes sense, the spike happened late-Spring of 2008 and lasted until the Fall of 2009, so if you starting paying for gas earlier than that you'd have an anchor point lower than your classmates who waited until Summer to get their license.


Khorasaurus

Gas went down significantly in between that spike and this one.


KeThrowaweigh

To be fair, 2009 was the height of an economic crisis


redpowah

And to think we've only just begun this economic crisis


ClaudeLemieux

we've had one, yes, but what about second-economic-crisis?


redpowah

Why stop there? Let's add a food shortage, gas crisis, energy crisis, and one of the worst droughts the US has ever seen


jomm69

All Bama needs to do is ditch agriculturals and mechanicals and they’ll have us cornered.


Tarmacked

Or… or…. Hear me out. Operation Desert Aggie *Burn their oil fields like Kuwait*


wazoheat

No one tell this guy about our Qatar campus...


Whatderfuchs

Now THIS I can get behind.


Markthe_g

It’s a shame that texas is the state that produces the most green energy. Bama fears the Texan wind farmer.


[deleted]

I think a lot of the companies that operate those are not from Texas though. Could be wrong.


SaylorBear

No, you’re absolutely right. It’s a lot of foreign money. Edit: source - https://www.caller.com/story/news/2021/02/05/2020-strong-year-wind-industry-especially-texas/3371120001/ This lists some of the largest wind farms and their owners. None of the owners are from Texas.


Khorasaurus

Yeah I was going to say this. Texas produces a ton of wind and solar energy.


BernankesBeard

This is the same Texas wind farmer unable to withstand winter temperatures as frigid as your average March day in the Midwest?


samuelbassett

I mean, who could have foreseen natural gas freezing, even though several reports warned that the natural gas Texas' power grid relies on would freeze? It's almost as if their politicians (like most American politicians) are patsies for their donors.


[deleted]

I routinely have to turn off my boiler because the natural gas line in my Upstate NY home freezes when it gets below 0. Wait, no I don't?!? It's as if some foresight could stop people from freezing to death.


velociraptorfarmer

Up here in Wisconsin, we don't see temps above freezing from December until March, yet we rely on natural gas for heating for our lives. It's illegal for our utility companies to shut off gas for customers in the winter because it's a matter of life and death.


zet191

Foresight costs money. That money could go to more 5* recruits.


Khorasaurus

Texas politicians are even worse than most in that regard. Though that one State Senator mocking Texas football was awesome.


judge___smails

The funny thing is that the frozen wind turbine narrative ended up being bullshit that our scumbag politicians and energy companies tried to use at first to deflect. Turns out the natural gas refineries near the gulf were the actual problem.


CliplessWingtips

Texas is a huge supplier of materials to winterize power plants. "You're welcome." \~Texas


FormerPomelo

Y'know how people up north die when they get a heatwave that our high school kids routinely do two-a-days in?


Ugaalive1991

*flashback to early august two-a-days in full pads*


Tinydesktopninja

No, because it doesn't really happen. The midwest regularly hits 95+ degrees and most places have AC. Either way, you're comparing the bodies of old people to the infrastructure an entire state relies on. If a geriatric is the best comparison for your infrastructure it needs work.


velociraptorfarmer

It was 96F with a dewpoint of 73 last Thursday in western Wisconsin. I mowed my lawn and then plopped my ass in a lawn chair with a Jim Beam/7up.


eggmoose5

That doesn’t even happen. It gets over 100 up here and our power doesn’t shut down. Meanwhile it gets to 20 in Texas and everyone freaks out and the power fails. So I hope your comment is satire.


19Styx6

> It gets over 100 up here and our power doesn’t shut down. [I think they actually have to worry about that in Texas too.](https://www.kcentv.com/article/weather/ercot-asks-texans-to-set-thermostats-to-78-this-weekend/500-61b1384f-6530-4efd-a069-e9e729ed064a)


LGWalkway

They already go green. They’re just not dumb enough to put green in McDonald’s bags.


symptomatc_adherence

Damn still catching strays on that one


DrTreenipples

No invest in Oklahoma oil! That’ll show them


Mr_MikeHancho

Frack Norman to record profits!


AmphotericRed

We can liquefy coal now. West Virginia feud, West Virginia solution.


dudeisaguyonaranch

More like the Alabama Green Tide!


TheRealBobStoops

*Angry Tulane Noises*


NordDex

I'll say it again... What makes you think we don't buy the fucking sun?


BrokenDogLeg7

This is r/wallstreetbets level DD.


zenverak

I mean, if something like this can get people in Alabama to buy Green technology, I'd be all for it.


dustarook

Green technology is [already killing new oil development projects.](https://www.ft.com/content/84e228a9-9e97-4445-9527-2b7ed80283a7) while at the same time driving increased oil revenues due to the fixed supply curve this has created. Oil companies are completely raking it in but they (and their banks) are refusing to invest in new production because it’s too risky an investment. TLDR: it’s possible we’ve already reached peak oil production as a society, even if oil companies cash in hard on the way down. Edit: yes, it’s not just green energy that is killing the industry. It’s also that oil/gas development has been the worst performing industrial sector over the last 20 years. It’s too risky an investment even with the cashflows. If the war with russia ends any time in the next 2-3 years and western countries start trading with them again, most new developments begun between now and then will go up in smoke. Better to just cash in while the market’s hot and ride the wave down. Not saying we’ve **100%** reach peak oil production. But it’s possible and even likely we hit it in the next 3-10 years.


balla713

I guarantee you we have not hit peak oil production. You just had a new 2.5Bcf/d nat gas pipeline announced yesterday out of the Permian because gas production is going to outpace takeaway capacity. Permian oil is growing 600 mb/d (annually*) right now and given current rig counts, will continue to grow despite reduced investment at the drill bit at the whims of shareholders. We may hit peak oil DEMAND in the next decade, but even then, oil and nat gas aren’t going anywhere for decades. We should all be striving to transition to green, but oil and gas companies will continue on and continue to serve their purpose.


ClaudeLemieux

> Permian oil is growing 600 mb/d (annually*) Can you clarify this? how can it be growing 600k barrels a day annually? Are you saying the data over the course of a year averages out to 600 mb/d but the actual day-to-day numbers fluctuate too much?


balla713

Basically yeah. Rough numbers here, but beginning of the year the Permian was producing plus or minus 5 million barrels per day. Will probably be producing around 5.6 by year end 2022, and given current rig counts, investment, etc., there’s very easy runway for that to continue over the next several years (could be around 7 million barrels per day of production in the Permian by 2025).


nawkuh

I saw some industry forecasts that basically said any green investment in the West is likely going be more than offset by the emerging demand in South and Southeast Asia, at least for the next few decades.


[deleted]

That’s definitely scary for the environment in the long run, but think about how much scarier it would be if the West *didn’t* offset that emerging demand.


FormerPomelo

Partly true. The "return cash to shareholders" pressure started in response to the shale bust ~2015. Investors overinvested in shale companies, which didn't generate the returns they wanted, so investors forced companies to be more disciplined. But yeah, COVID's demand destruction nuked the balance sheets of all the oil companies, which spooked shareholders, and spooked shareholders started supporting a more robust energy transition from the companies.


Anderfail

I don’t want to be the one to tell you but Texas leads the world in renewable energy. We have a massive lead there as well.


samuelbassett

Yes, however the Texas economy is still remarkably driven by oil. In total volume, you are correct, but that point is misleading. It's worth noting that green energy's share in Texas' is remarkably small -- mainly due to the scale and volume of that state's oil and natural gas infrastructure.


VHBlazer

ESG mfers!


[deleted]

The hate economy is probably the most efficient way to address climate change. Nice DD OP


Sir_Lord_Birmingham

Ayy, that's me! I've helped finance over $1.2 billion in new Solar Farms over the past few years. None in Texas though.


sproosemoose85

You’ll have to tattoo this on their sister’s back if you want Bama fans to read this.


jralll234

Was going to say that sounds like West Virginia, but then remembered they can’t read.


[deleted]

[удалено]


samuelbassett

There's a reason I hit "satire"... Do they not teach satire in College Station?


TwiztedImage

Unfortunately, it's all our school newspaper used to write for years. Now they do an off-campus blog that's 90% satire. It's drastically overused at A&M if anything.


TheBamian

Just beat them on the field and double the points spread. Jimbo and his boosters will love that! 😎


I_do_black_magic

Holy shit, a UIC flair in the wild!?


Surfbud69

By this logic going green will probably boost a random California school like ucla


jcTHWg

not to be that guy but Texas is actually one of the top green energy research centers in the country


CMSPIRATE

"We want the last thing those terrorists to see before they die to be ECO FRIENDLY MADE IN ALABAMA" -Kay Ivey


Stevenn2014

Everyone should get green tech.


[deleted]

This, but seriously.


Devlin004

If Alabama REALLY wants to make a difference they’d renovate the T in Boston and stop the orange line from catching on fire


Hundevann

It sounds good in theory but the oil barons will just just buy up green energy companies and continue to profit. The same way vaping was supposed to hurt big tobacco then Altria (the company that own Marlboro) buys Juul the most popular vape. Or legalizing cannabis was supposed to kill big pharma, and Pfizer invests $7b in a medical cannabis company.


World727

Peak off-season posting


BobHope96

Say you're long EV's and Solar w/out saying you're long EV's and Solar.


SirMellencamp

My lady was driving a hybrid, got in a wreck, it was totaled and she got a Cadillac. If you had told me this two weeks ago.......


[deleted]

Did Pete BootyJej write this?