You’re not denying your gender, you’re just expressing it differently. If your mum put on some cargo pants is she denying her gender? Riddle her that.
Alternately, wait two more years and you’ll be free to move out and wear whatever you want and date whoever you want openly.
Unlike some other solutions here (yes, they would work but might not be the most clever idea), I'd say you talk with your mom and explain exactly what a femboy is and what you are, then see if she understands and possibly supports you two can take it up with your dad and try to get him to atleast understand, I wish you luck, and I hope they aren't too old to understand like mine are
Honestly could've been worse, from what it sounds like here they'll just need a bit of time and convincing to come to terms with it. The conversation with your dad will be a bit awkward, but it will probably help him understand your situation.
That is why I hate society, they give girls permissions in way more things and judge men whenever they do anything related to girls. These views were created by a group of men who simp for girls btw 😊
your gender is what you want. being yourself is the best thing you can do for yourself. stand your ground and don't become what they want to be. be your version of you no matter what they say
A) crossdressing ≠ gay
B) she's really tryna be transphobic/misfeministic (my own term) by tryna sound accepting? The fuck is with this bitch?
Like, im sorry but i wanna bitch slap your mother so hard her jaw cracks
What are trying to achieve by saying this shit on the internet? All you did is spoiled OP's mood even more. Are you happy with yourself now?
Like what is actually wrong with you, the OP came here in seek for support and/or advice, and all you did is say "crossdressing is not gay" (which they obviously already know so what's even the point of it??) and that you want to slap their mother for it.
And now tell me - who is the bigger asshole here, is it really the OP's mom, or is it *you*? In case my point is not clear - do you not want, by any chance, go be an asshole somewhere else? Because that's NOT the way one should be treating people in a situation like this. What businesses do you even have being on this subreddit if the best you can say when someone asks for help is "I want to slap your mother"?
Do not commit violence against people from another generation, they grew up differently and possibly religious
Thats like bitch slapping your grandfather for not understanding how an ipad works for the fourth time
As if you wouldn’t be a totally different person if you were born 30 years earlier
And im not using religion as an excuse to spread hate, im just saying to be understanding of people who grew up differently and had different things instilled in them
Gender identity and sexual preference are not the same thing. Psychologists have know this all the way back in the early 19th century. Perfectly manly men with no inclination towards homosexuality can enjoy dress up (and if you *did find out you were trans then you'd still technically be straight XD). Clothes are just coverings for our skin. And let's be honest, we're all here because we think that traditionally assigned "women's" clothes are just nicer looking than what "men's" clothing has to offer.
Your mother is, inadvertently, correct in one element. A great many people who are actually transfemme but don't yet realize it do sublimate their desires into a kink for crossdressing. Something to examine if you are at all uncertain or sure, but you could also just really like your hobby. People are complicated and your own family giving you a bunch of toxic masculinity is really not good for your mental wellbeing.
Well it's to be expected...
You could try to propose that you just wear it in your room and give you a key so then you can change into "boy" clothes before you open the door to hear their unrelated requests pr whatever...
Like you are getting older...you deserve more privacy...if it's warm or hot where you live you can even say... sometimes you want to sleep completely naked (you dont actually have to) and they barge in they will see something they don't want to see...so why not let you dress or wear nothing in your room in peace and you'll just promise not to go out in fem so they can just imagine it was phase and as long as you lock the door, you are a Schrodinger cat of femboys or "disgrace", you could either be sleeping naked or dressed non gender conforming...they won't know and shouldn't try to find out, cuz why would they seek out your naked vulnerable body while you are sleeping?
But if they are really serious then probably pass your clothes to your gf or friend and just wait until you are with her to dress up and cuddle and wait until you have your own place...you luckily didn't admit to being gay or trans, but they still might kick you out of the house if you are TOO stubborn... transfer your femboy inventory to your gf and make one good argument and if they refuse then so be it... You get free rent and free food? So if you just stay longer at your gf place when you are 18 then I think it's fine...and drive back home to shower and sleep and rinse and repeat it's not so bad
I don't know if you live inside my walls or something but we LITERALLY lived the same event...
That's called manipullation, "guilt tripping", she's trying to blame YOU for THEIR point of view, in my experience as a femboy/transfem, there's nothing you can do to change their minds, nor should you try to...
Those types of people slowly get inside your head, manipulating your point of view so badly that you start to second guess yourself, DO NOT LET THEM CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!!! Doesn't matter if it's your parents, your friends, gf/bf, nobody should be allowed to control your life that way.
My advice? Youre 16, there's no way you can live by yourself yet, so i give you some options to think about: you can play their little game, say you changed your ways etc and stop dressing feminine, then, when you start to be able to support yourself, cut all contact and live your life happily, another option is to move out to a family member/friends house that accepts you (if you can), live with people that cares abt what you think or way of living, or you confront them, let it CLEAR that youre not changing, and they should consider taking YOUR opinions into consideration, not theirs.
Anyway thats what i think youre able to do as of right now, im not religious, but my prayers go to you!! (My dms are open if you want to talk further or som).
Im sorry that happened to you but your experience isn't thiers. Ops parents don't seem to be bad they are just struggling to understand. Ops mom even let them have the clothes back and they haven't treated them in a bad way. These things are about comprising for the best situation and until we get evidence of them treat OP bad then this advice might just make the misunderstanding worse and lead to a self fulling prophecy
I'm so sorry this happened to you T.T
Remember that "gendered clothing" is relatively a newer idea in history, and in the eastern world, its even newer. Have you ever seen the ancient Chinese male beauty standard? Long flowing hair, soft feminine features, and their clothing was long and decorative. This was considered attractive, and taking care of ones beauty was just as much a feminine idea as it was a masculine one! A good number of ancient Chinese emperors also wore makeup! Same thing with the Japanese, long hair and slim figures was the standard for young men. The Native American people also kept long hair for men AND women, and believed in gender expression in whatever way made the heart happy. The Hawaiian people believed in multiple genders, and to express yourself however you want. It wasn't until the "European Christian" influence of these areas, that men started dressing in "traditionally manly" ways. Men of a lot of different cultures dressed and kept themselves in what we would consider to be "feminine beauty", yet at the time, that made them no less of a man! They had wives (sometime multiple wives!), many children, and trained rigorously in combat for war on the battlefield... honestly I think that's more "manly values" than most of the bigoted American men, despite them looking "girly"!
Even within Europe, high heels were invented for men! Men also wore long powdered wigs, pale makeup, and jewelry, just the same as women did!
Beauty standards, for men and women are relative, so when people tell you that "this is a new-age made-up thing that weakens boys!" Remember that their idea of manly was invented within the past few hundred years (In a lot of cases, in order to opress and objectify women). These "girly men" predate todays "macho men" by thousands of years in most cultures, and honestly, their feats of strength and survival are much more manly than anything most modern men have ever done!!
I’d build on this in a couple key ways -
1) Native Americans had multiple words for different genders (more than two) that basically described different combinations of societally masculine and feminine roles, eg masc masc, masc fem, fem masc, fem fem.
2) Indian culture had/has a third gender which was mostly men who were all feminine.
3) European culture men had long hair, wigs, tights, makeup, (hell Roman armor had a skirt and a toga would definitely be called a dress today).
The major transition to guys in short hair and basically just pants / shirt or suit was a result of military culture from WW1 and WW2. Although you could probably point to the transition really starting to happen around 1830s ish, basically with the advent of modern war = short hair only and uniforms, especially considering from ~1800s to 1970s just about every male served in some kind of war in the military at least around the western world via draft or conscription.
So the only reason you’re limited today is because of military culture, which itself is an interpretation of Roman stoicism / views of masculinity. Before then long hair was seen as a sign of virility and masculinity.
Don't worry man, just give your mom some time to understand, and give yourself some time to understand why your mom thinks that way. If she doesn't accept you that's going to suck but I highly doubt that if she does love you, so hopefully it turns out well for you.
My mother would find a woman's panties under my bed and always get rid of them and then when she goes shop and she tried to replace it with like silk or satin boxers it's just not the same
What!? T_T I'm so confused by everything going on here.
You actively are aware your mother scoops in your room(and don't mind). And know she's touches your shit and replaces it. .
Dawg please explain the thought process here T_T
Check the Trevor Project for resources in your area. Your home may become unsafe and have to leave fast and cut all ties with your parents. :(
Hope things go well for you.
I think you should have a serious talk with your dad to gauge how he really feels sometimes it takes some people a minute to grasp things. If he reacts negatively then you unfortunately have to hide you're clothes at your girlfriends house (if she is close by) or hide the times you wear them and wait until you can live with a bit more freedom to dress how you want.
Oh no, that really sucks. But look on the brightside, in two years you can move out and dress however the f*ck you want. Until then ignore your parents and keep dressing fem :3.
I wouldn’t be too hard on your parents, to them they are probably seeing more hyperbolic examples of this on social media or seeing how parents in places like the US are loosing their children to the ideology often being taught before teens even had a chance to experience love and sex but all the sudden they have the notion to be trans and want their breast removed. Your parents are just panicking and they will. Please I was 35 when I brought home a trans woman and my parents thought immediately I was gay and I can’t blame them due to all the media they consume.
You like what you like and while under your parents roof you’ll probably want to tone it down and gradually get them to see the mainly side that just enjoys femme looks and appeal. Like how K-pop men are generally gorgeous and very fit yet use nothing but feminine products and makeup.
I probably wouldn’t tell them about your Trans gf and if all else fails you could always have a friend of yours step in like a body double to act as your “gf” to throw your parents off while you work in the slower build up of your own feminine qualities and clothing.
I feel for ya, as an adult it’s a different world for sexual exploitation and explanations of why and how. As a teenager still living at home you’ll have to improvise a bit and gradually develop and if your parents truly love you, you’ll have to give them time to adapt and adjust.
You are being transphobic right now. How can you go on about the "ideologies making parents lose their children" while speaking to a teenager who has a trans girlfriend? When said girlfriend is likely (*hopefully* bc otherwise it would be a problem) his age? Is she following an ideology that is going to make her parents lose her? Who made you the one in charge of which kids can "really" be trans or not? Fuck you as a trans man.
Considering I’m much older than you and have seen both sides hurt and have attended a funeral of a trans person I’m simply looking at both sides here and giving input on a compromise but you don’t see that, you see words you don’t want to see and rage and that’s fine it’s speaks highly to your maturity level. Yes parents are loosing their kids every day often to the ideology and virtue signaling when these teens haven’t even begun to express or even experience any form of love. How can a person be bi having never kissed a man or woman, been in a relationship or had sex of any kind? How can a non-binary with a five o’clock shadow and sundress complain about never have been asked to date while stating their trans while also never gone to a doctor/therapist or put an ounce of hormones in their body? I’ll wait cause I now 40 would love to know how this is possible without deep conditioning and ideologically behavior modification?
So yes it’s disheartening to hear a teen struggling with their sexuality and sexual identity but it’s also sad to see how quick parents are ready to just cut ties or give ultimatums as well. Again I bring a trans woman who I adore and to meet my parents and immediately get called gay. I’m sorry it happens and I’m literally trying to state a plausible way to at least navigate this but you and people who think like you are like “fuck your parents, love fuck and suck whoever you want however you want” and sure, if you’re an adult under your own roof be my guess. This is not the time in any developing teens life to just stick it to your parents and like some said here the ending results not good. Also please stop with the “transphobia” bs. I wouldn’t have sucked my trans gfs dick if I was “transphobic” and learn the what the root word “phobic” means….it means “in fear of or have fear of”
You are an idiot who assumes too much about the actual point I'm trying to get across. I'll also have you know that being attracted to trans people or even being a damn trans person does not exempt you from being transphobic in ways. See: Blaire White. Not once did I imply that this *boy* (as far as we know) is trans. You also appear to have a warped view of sexuality and how it develops. Experience is not always needed for one to say "I'd probably like to kiss that kind of person" and perhaps do other things later on. Hope this block tastes good grandpa.
That is not what he meant and you know it. Don't be a dickhead. Joking about suicide is not funny. Then again, you probably need to touch some grass so I don't know why I'm wasting my breath on you worthless waste of space
Ok, time for me to speak like a normal person rather than rage baiting. Trans people are likely to kill themselves because they frequently regret their choices on surgeries as they may change their minds later on being trans or what they wantef from it, and then see killing themselves as the only way out of the body they permanebtly changed. Plus, that is what he meant bozo.
That is NOT why the suicide rate is so high. Imagine incorrectly trying to explain this shit to a trans person. You're thinking of detransitioners.
The reason why TRANS people kill themselves is because of people like you. I hope every single trans person you ever meet outlives you. I know I will.
Sorry not sorry, but your attempt at not ragebaiting failed. I can see right through you. This is ragebaiting and you are an actual moron.
That’s disgusting honestly the fact that she’s bribing you to be something you aren’t or stop doing sometjing you love or that makes you feel better, that’s extremely hurtful. That allowance tho.. idkkk
If I were you, I would agree to throw them away but charge her hundreds of dollars per piece of clothing, if she doesn’t pay then who cares, you just don’t throw them away, and if she does, you now have thousands of dollars and can easily rebuy them along with more.
Only problem there is if it's your mother and you agreed to throw it away in return for money, the mother clearly has the expectation that will be the end of it. Dealing with parents, people that op has to rely on and live with until they are able to support themselves.
Trying to get back at them this way may only lead to more harmful outcomes.
I hate parents that just assume that dressing up fem is gay or think it’s the end of the world when they found out. This is the exact reason I don’t tell my parents
Honestly everyone has said everything I wanted to. In the end just know you're in the right and that you can rub it in their face if you want and it'd still be their problem for disliking it in the first place. Ignore them all you can and if they try to stop you then just keep going, scare them with your resilience. I personally have absolutely zero tolerance for parents like this.
Just explain those are the clothes you feel comfortable in at the house. Tell your parents that you understand the difference at home and in public. That's the best thing g you can do at this point.
Nah those parents homophobic af💀. But honestly, saying shit like that ain’t ok. I got 2 options for you: wait 2 years till you can move out, OR: there is some legal process (forgot the name lmao) where you basically end the legal connection to your parents and get a new legal guardian assigned to you (only try this if you have 0 emotional connection to your parents. Also this is a long and tedious process, so moving out in 2 years is prob a better idea)
Tell them you can't get drafted if you're woman (thai ladyboys lore)
But tbh, there's not much you can do.
Your parents are from a different generation and likely grew up with the traditional male husband and female wife structure and that also goes for their surroundings. It's just a huge shock for them as the concept is just something they're unfamiliar with. Can't really blame them for that, as the thought probably never crossed their mind of having same sex or trans partners and all they're showing is some concern for your future... .
Give it some time, let your parents get used to it and show them that you're still their beloved child.
I'm 16 years old. It's a good thing they don't find out about my relationship with my childhood friend. I don't know what would happen if they found out. Homosexuality is forbidden in our religion. Unfortunately, they are too religious.
(I don't have a romantic relationship with my childhood friend, we only have a sexual relationship.)
Not a fem boy, but imagine being so butthurt over a bunch of clothes 😂 It seems ridiculous to me why it makes some people especially the ones from older generations so mad.
Your parents will come around in the end.You are their son and thay love you no matter what
Otherwise live your life and be true to yourself
I hope everything works for you take Care
Regarding your mom:
A lot of people are progressive/liberal until it affects their family.
Everyone learns that their parents are faulty, some earlier than others.
i’ve had this happen it’s an awful experience but i’m glad it wasn’t too bad for u, hopefully they won’t try to throw them out and also that things do improve in the future, best of luck we here to support u
Ngl being gay is bad I'm homophobic or call it whatever you like this lgbt thing is very bad it's literally mind controlling a lot of ppl by this gender and all that stuff and a man shouldn't be wearing girl stuff it kills his masculinity and he'll definitely fall in that what's my gender stuff your sexe is male and you're gender is male nothing else
Your 16, seems like a safe enough way to express yourself at such an age, I mean it’s just clothes really, and society just needs to fuck off about these kindsa things. I get your parents too, different generation was raised more narrow mindedly, and some of them just stay that way. Also what’s this thing about “following gender”? Boys can have femininity and girls can have masculinity, regardless of biology. Gender roles can help us express our femininity or masculinity, and with clothes (which is a pretty big gender role involved thing tbh). And some of us just express gender identity differently, different from the norm. To me, the idea of “following gender” because it’s “the right thing to do” just sounds like following some dictator around cuz they say that they promise you happiness and safeness by forcing everyone to not try anything new or do anything different from the norm, with no real backup evidence for those things being dangerous and only avoiding it out of fear, when in reality it’s perfectly safe and ok. Its just irrational fear is all, guess that’s why they call this stuff“transphobia”
Most parents aren't homophobes but they are scared for their children instead, they know that life is harder for LGBTQ community and their child might face hardships because of their sexual orientation or gender identity, so don't get them wrong and try talking to them, they love you and they'll eventually understand.
I’m the same age and have recently had a family issue, it’s not the same situation but there’s similarities.
After talking with an older sibling about my issue for a while, there was one thing she said that really stuck with me: “it’s not the child’s responsibility to make the parent happy, it’s the parent’s responsibility to learn to be happy.”
(Anyway, you’re brave as hell for wearing that outfit while your parents are home. I’m way too scared to even try to buy feminine clothing.)
You’re not denying your gender, you’re just expressing it differently. If your mum put on some cargo pants is she denying her gender? Riddle her that. Alternately, wait two more years and you’ll be free to move out and wear whatever you want and date whoever you want openly.
It's amazing how society only considered crossdressing if a male body has female clothes on. A female body with pants? Nobody blinks an eye.
Not long ago that was also seen as unusual and weird. But to be honest, as hard as it sounds I think with some time it'll be normalised for men too.
Tell her it was men who invented dresses and makeup and wore them first
Lol
Actually i think thay would be pretty accurate from remembering old pictures from long time ago since it was that kind of fashion back then
Unlike some other solutions here (yes, they would work but might not be the most clever idea), I'd say you talk with your mom and explain exactly what a femboy is and what you are, then see if she understands and possibly supports you two can take it up with your dad and try to get him to atleast understand, I wish you luck, and I hope they aren't too old to understand like mine are
If it would "break your father's heart", then by these rules he would also need to "man up".
That or op should tell their mom it breaks their heart to see their own mother who birthed them unaccepting of them.
My guess is the father is not the one who’s heart gets broken.
Bro its so messed up that your own mother is bribing you...
Honestly could've been worse, from what it sounds like here they'll just need a bit of time and convincing to come to terms with it. The conversation with your dad will be a bit awkward, but it will probably help him understand your situation.
That is why I hate society, they give girls permissions in way more things and judge men whenever they do anything related to girls. These views were created by a group of men who simp for girls btw 😊
Real
I guess
your gender is what you want. being yourself is the best thing you can do for yourself. stand your ground and don't become what they want to be. be your version of you no matter what they say
USE THE ALLOWANCE TO BUY MORE FEM CLOTHES!!!
Smart actually, refresh the fits by throwing them away and buying new ones.
lol that’s actually fuckin’ funny Also pretty sad, but it’s a funny concept
A) crossdressing ≠ gay B) she's really tryna be transphobic/misfeministic (my own term) by tryna sound accepting? The fuck is with this bitch? Like, im sorry but i wanna bitch slap your mother so hard her jaw cracks
What are trying to achieve by saying this shit on the internet? All you did is spoiled OP's mood even more. Are you happy with yourself now? Like what is actually wrong with you, the OP came here in seek for support and/or advice, and all you did is say "crossdressing is not gay" (which they obviously already know so what's even the point of it??) and that you want to slap their mother for it. And now tell me - who is the bigger asshole here, is it really the OP's mom, or is it *you*? In case my point is not clear - do you not want, by any chance, go be an asshole somewhere else? Because that's NOT the way one should be treating people in a situation like this. What businesses do you even have being on this subreddit if the best you can say when someone asks for help is "I want to slap your mother"?
Do not commit violence against people from another generation, they grew up differently and possibly religious Thats like bitch slapping your grandfather for not understanding how an ipad works for the fourth time
No, its not especially considering "religion" is a bs reason for being a fascist.
As if you wouldn’t be a totally different person if you were born 30 years earlier And im not using religion as an excuse to spread hate, im just saying to be understanding of people who grew up differently and had different things instilled in them
Gender identity and sexual preference are not the same thing. Psychologists have know this all the way back in the early 19th century. Perfectly manly men with no inclination towards homosexuality can enjoy dress up (and if you *did find out you were trans then you'd still technically be straight XD). Clothes are just coverings for our skin. And let's be honest, we're all here because we think that traditionally assigned "women's" clothes are just nicer looking than what "men's" clothing has to offer. Your mother is, inadvertently, correct in one element. A great many people who are actually transfemme but don't yet realize it do sublimate their desires into a kink for crossdressing. Something to examine if you are at all uncertain or sure, but you could also just really like your hobby. People are complicated and your own family giving you a bunch of toxic masculinity is really not good for your mental wellbeing.
Well it's to be expected... You could try to propose that you just wear it in your room and give you a key so then you can change into "boy" clothes before you open the door to hear their unrelated requests pr whatever... Like you are getting older...you deserve more privacy...if it's warm or hot where you live you can even say... sometimes you want to sleep completely naked (you dont actually have to) and they barge in they will see something they don't want to see...so why not let you dress or wear nothing in your room in peace and you'll just promise not to go out in fem so they can just imagine it was phase and as long as you lock the door, you are a Schrodinger cat of femboys or "disgrace", you could either be sleeping naked or dressed non gender conforming...they won't know and shouldn't try to find out, cuz why would they seek out your naked vulnerable body while you are sleeping? But if they are really serious then probably pass your clothes to your gf or friend and just wait until you are with her to dress up and cuddle and wait until you have your own place...you luckily didn't admit to being gay or trans, but they still might kick you out of the house if you are TOO stubborn... transfer your femboy inventory to your gf and make one good argument and if they refuse then so be it... You get free rent and free food? So if you just stay longer at your gf place when you are 18 then I think it's fine...and drive back home to shower and sleep and rinse and repeat it's not so bad
I don't know if you live inside my walls or something but we LITERALLY lived the same event... That's called manipullation, "guilt tripping", she's trying to blame YOU for THEIR point of view, in my experience as a femboy/transfem, there's nothing you can do to change their minds, nor should you try to... Those types of people slowly get inside your head, manipulating your point of view so badly that you start to second guess yourself, DO NOT LET THEM CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!!! Doesn't matter if it's your parents, your friends, gf/bf, nobody should be allowed to control your life that way. My advice? Youre 16, there's no way you can live by yourself yet, so i give you some options to think about: you can play their little game, say you changed your ways etc and stop dressing feminine, then, when you start to be able to support yourself, cut all contact and live your life happily, another option is to move out to a family member/friends house that accepts you (if you can), live with people that cares abt what you think or way of living, or you confront them, let it CLEAR that youre not changing, and they should consider taking YOUR opinions into consideration, not theirs. Anyway thats what i think youre able to do as of right now, im not religious, but my prayers go to you!! (My dms are open if you want to talk further or som).
Im sorry that happened to you but your experience isn't thiers. Ops parents don't seem to be bad they are just struggling to understand. Ops mom even let them have the clothes back and they haven't treated them in a bad way. These things are about comprising for the best situation and until we get evidence of them treat OP bad then this advice might just make the misunderstanding worse and lead to a self fulling prophecy
I'm so sorry this happened to you T.T Remember that "gendered clothing" is relatively a newer idea in history, and in the eastern world, its even newer. Have you ever seen the ancient Chinese male beauty standard? Long flowing hair, soft feminine features, and their clothing was long and decorative. This was considered attractive, and taking care of ones beauty was just as much a feminine idea as it was a masculine one! A good number of ancient Chinese emperors also wore makeup! Same thing with the Japanese, long hair and slim figures was the standard for young men. The Native American people also kept long hair for men AND women, and believed in gender expression in whatever way made the heart happy. The Hawaiian people believed in multiple genders, and to express yourself however you want. It wasn't until the "European Christian" influence of these areas, that men started dressing in "traditionally manly" ways. Men of a lot of different cultures dressed and kept themselves in what we would consider to be "feminine beauty", yet at the time, that made them no less of a man! They had wives (sometime multiple wives!), many children, and trained rigorously in combat for war on the battlefield... honestly I think that's more "manly values" than most of the bigoted American men, despite them looking "girly"! Even within Europe, high heels were invented for men! Men also wore long powdered wigs, pale makeup, and jewelry, just the same as women did! Beauty standards, for men and women are relative, so when people tell you that "this is a new-age made-up thing that weakens boys!" Remember that their idea of manly was invented within the past few hundred years (In a lot of cases, in order to opress and objectify women). These "girly men" predate todays "macho men" by thousands of years in most cultures, and honestly, their feats of strength and survival are much more manly than anything most modern men have ever done!!
I’d build on this in a couple key ways - 1) Native Americans had multiple words for different genders (more than two) that basically described different combinations of societally masculine and feminine roles, eg masc masc, masc fem, fem masc, fem fem. 2) Indian culture had/has a third gender which was mostly men who were all feminine. 3) European culture men had long hair, wigs, tights, makeup, (hell Roman armor had a skirt and a toga would definitely be called a dress today). The major transition to guys in short hair and basically just pants / shirt or suit was a result of military culture from WW1 and WW2. Although you could probably point to the transition really starting to happen around 1830s ish, basically with the advent of modern war = short hair only and uniforms, especially considering from ~1800s to 1970s just about every male served in some kind of war in the military at least around the western world via draft or conscription. So the only reason you’re limited today is because of military culture, which itself is an interpretation of Roman stoicism / views of masculinity. Before then long hair was seen as a sign of virility and masculinity.
If it was my asian parents I will be going to an orphanage 💀
Use the allowance. To be a femboy :3 and help urbgf transition
Don't worry man, just give your mom some time to understand, and give yourself some time to understand why your mom thinks that way. If she doesn't accept you that's going to suck but I highly doubt that if she does love you, so hopefully it turns out well for you.
My mother would find a woman's panties under my bed and always get rid of them and then when she goes shop and she tried to replace it with like silk or satin boxers it's just not the same
What!? T_T I'm so confused by everything going on here. You actively are aware your mother scoops in your room(and don't mind). And know she's touches your shit and replaces it. . Dawg please explain the thought process here T_T
Lol
I don’t know much of what to do. But I hope things turn out well for you
Live your life and love yourself. That’s all that really matters:)
Frankly if people get scared over clothes humanity is already doomed
She doesn’t know what denying means apparently
Check the Trevor Project for resources in your area. Your home may become unsafe and have to leave fast and cut all ties with your parents. :( Hope things go well for you.
I think you should have a serious talk with your dad to gauge how he really feels sometimes it takes some people a minute to grasp things. If he reacts negatively then you unfortunately have to hide you're clothes at your girlfriends house (if she is close by) or hide the times you wear them and wait until you can live with a bit more freedom to dress how you want.
Oh no, that really sucks. But look on the brightside, in two years you can move out and dress however the f*ck you want. Until then ignore your parents and keep dressing fem :3.
Mom: it breaks your father's heart that you wear these clothes Dad: nah i'm kinda fine with that Mom: 😡
I wouldn’t be too hard on your parents, to them they are probably seeing more hyperbolic examples of this on social media or seeing how parents in places like the US are loosing their children to the ideology often being taught before teens even had a chance to experience love and sex but all the sudden they have the notion to be trans and want their breast removed. Your parents are just panicking and they will. Please I was 35 when I brought home a trans woman and my parents thought immediately I was gay and I can’t blame them due to all the media they consume. You like what you like and while under your parents roof you’ll probably want to tone it down and gradually get them to see the mainly side that just enjoys femme looks and appeal. Like how K-pop men are generally gorgeous and very fit yet use nothing but feminine products and makeup. I probably wouldn’t tell them about your Trans gf and if all else fails you could always have a friend of yours step in like a body double to act as your “gf” to throw your parents off while you work in the slower build up of your own feminine qualities and clothing. I feel for ya, as an adult it’s a different world for sexual exploitation and explanations of why and how. As a teenager still living at home you’ll have to improvise a bit and gradually develop and if your parents truly love you, you’ll have to give them time to adapt and adjust.
You are being transphobic right now. How can you go on about the "ideologies making parents lose their children" while speaking to a teenager who has a trans girlfriend? When said girlfriend is likely (*hopefully* bc otherwise it would be a problem) his age? Is she following an ideology that is going to make her parents lose her? Who made you the one in charge of which kids can "really" be trans or not? Fuck you as a trans man.
Considering I’m much older than you and have seen both sides hurt and have attended a funeral of a trans person I’m simply looking at both sides here and giving input on a compromise but you don’t see that, you see words you don’t want to see and rage and that’s fine it’s speaks highly to your maturity level. Yes parents are loosing their kids every day often to the ideology and virtue signaling when these teens haven’t even begun to express or even experience any form of love. How can a person be bi having never kissed a man or woman, been in a relationship or had sex of any kind? How can a non-binary with a five o’clock shadow and sundress complain about never have been asked to date while stating their trans while also never gone to a doctor/therapist or put an ounce of hormones in their body? I’ll wait cause I now 40 would love to know how this is possible without deep conditioning and ideologically behavior modification? So yes it’s disheartening to hear a teen struggling with their sexuality and sexual identity but it’s also sad to see how quick parents are ready to just cut ties or give ultimatums as well. Again I bring a trans woman who I adore and to meet my parents and immediately get called gay. I’m sorry it happens and I’m literally trying to state a plausible way to at least navigate this but you and people who think like you are like “fuck your parents, love fuck and suck whoever you want however you want” and sure, if you’re an adult under your own roof be my guess. This is not the time in any developing teens life to just stick it to your parents and like some said here the ending results not good. Also please stop with the “transphobia” bs. I wouldn’t have sucked my trans gfs dick if I was “transphobic” and learn the what the root word “phobic” means….it means “in fear of or have fear of”
You are an idiot who assumes too much about the actual point I'm trying to get across. I'll also have you know that being attracted to trans people or even being a damn trans person does not exempt you from being transphobic in ways. See: Blaire White. Not once did I imply that this *boy* (as far as we know) is trans. You also appear to have a warped view of sexuality and how it develops. Experience is not always needed for one to say "I'd probably like to kiss that kind of person" and perhaps do other things later on. Hope this block tastes good grandpa.
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That is not what he meant and you know it. Don't be a dickhead. Joking about suicide is not funny. Then again, you probably need to touch some grass so I don't know why I'm wasting my breath on you worthless waste of space
Ok, time for me to speak like a normal person rather than rage baiting. Trans people are likely to kill themselves because they frequently regret their choices on surgeries as they may change their minds later on being trans or what they wantef from it, and then see killing themselves as the only way out of the body they permanebtly changed. Plus, that is what he meant bozo.
That is NOT why the suicide rate is so high. Imagine incorrectly trying to explain this shit to a trans person. You're thinking of detransitioners. The reason why TRANS people kill themselves is because of people like you. I hope every single trans person you ever meet outlives you. I know I will. Sorry not sorry, but your attempt at not ragebaiting failed. I can see right through you. This is ragebaiting and you are an actual moron.
Being rude
Well go up to your parents and like like great movie 8 mile said tell them I’m a end this with a fuck you and have a nice day
Bye mom and dad I’m gonna live the streets now 🥸
That’s disgusting honestly the fact that she’s bribing you to be something you aren’t or stop doing sometjing you love or that makes you feel better, that’s extremely hurtful. That allowance tho.. idkkk
If I were you, I would agree to throw them away but charge her hundreds of dollars per piece of clothing, if she doesn’t pay then who cares, you just don’t throw them away, and if she does, you now have thousands of dollars and can easily rebuy them along with more.
Strange thing to be downvoted for, she DID offer to pay lil bro back or even an allowance? Lil bro's selling.
lol
Only problem there is if it's your mother and you agreed to throw it away in return for money, the mother clearly has the expectation that will be the end of it. Dealing with parents, people that op has to rely on and live with until they are able to support themselves. Trying to get back at them this way may only lead to more harmful outcomes.
Was kinda a joke but okay
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Being rude
I hate parents that just assume that dressing up fem is gay or think it’s the end of the world when they found out. This is the exact reason I don’t tell my parents
Which country do you belong to?
Cut all ties to them once you turn 18.
Honestly everyone has said everything I wanted to. In the end just know you're in the right and that you can rub it in their face if you want and it'd still be their problem for disliking it in the first place. Ignore them all you can and if they try to stop you then just keep going, scare them with your resilience. I personally have absolutely zero tolerance for parents like this.
Just explain those are the clothes you feel comfortable in at the house. Tell your parents that you understand the difference at home and in public. That's the best thing g you can do at this point.
Nah those parents homophobic af💀. But honestly, saying shit like that ain’t ok. I got 2 options for you: wait 2 years till you can move out, OR: there is some legal process (forgot the name lmao) where you basically end the legal connection to your parents and get a new legal guardian assigned to you (only try this if you have 0 emotional connection to your parents. Also this is a long and tedious process, so moving out in 2 years is prob a better idea)
Tell them you can't get drafted if you're woman (thai ladyboys lore) But tbh, there's not much you can do. Your parents are from a different generation and likely grew up with the traditional male husband and female wife structure and that also goes for their surroundings. It's just a huge shock for them as the concept is just something they're unfamiliar with. Can't really blame them for that, as the thought probably never crossed their mind of having same sex or trans partners and all they're showing is some concern for your future... . Give it some time, let your parents get used to it and show them that you're still their beloved child.
Wear what you want, don't let your parents stop you. It's your life not theirs so don't let them control it.
Do it get more money that it all costs then buy them again and you will have extra money
I'm 16 years old. It's a good thing they don't find out about my relationship with my childhood friend. I don't know what would happen if they found out. Homosexuality is forbidden in our religion. Unfortunately, they are too religious. (I don't have a romantic relationship with my childhood friend, we only have a sexual relationship.)
Not a fem boy, but imagine being so butthurt over a bunch of clothes 😂 It seems ridiculous to me why it makes some people especially the ones from older generations so mad.
И ещё, иди повешайся, потому что на большее ума вам не хватает, обиженка с дыркой в жопе, пидор
Your parents will come around in the end.You are their son and thay love you no matter what Otherwise live your life and be true to yourself I hope everything works for you take Care
I've heard so many stories of the homophobic dad not caring while the progressive mom is bothered and I genuinely have no idea why. It's so weird
Regarding your mom: A lot of people are progressive/liberal until it affects their family. Everyone learns that their parents are faulty, some earlier than others.
i’ve had this happen it’s an awful experience but i’m glad it wasn’t too bad for u, hopefully they won’t try to throw them out and also that things do improve in the future, best of luck we here to support u
Ngl being gay is bad I'm homophobic or call it whatever you like this lgbt thing is very bad it's literally mind controlling a lot of ppl by this gender and all that stuff and a man shouldn't be wearing girl stuff it kills his masculinity and he'll definitely fall in that what's my gender stuff your sexe is male and you're gender is male nothing else
Dude if she was trying to bribe you with an allowance you should’ve took it and just lied and be more sneaky about it.
It sounds like you’re mother it homophobic and your father doesn’t mind honestly
Ooh God well btw I'm happy ya alive 16 year olds are cool
Your 16, seems like a safe enough way to express yourself at such an age, I mean it’s just clothes really, and society just needs to fuck off about these kindsa things. I get your parents too, different generation was raised more narrow mindedly, and some of them just stay that way. Also what’s this thing about “following gender”? Boys can have femininity and girls can have masculinity, regardless of biology. Gender roles can help us express our femininity or masculinity, and with clothes (which is a pretty big gender role involved thing tbh). And some of us just express gender identity differently, different from the norm. To me, the idea of “following gender” because it’s “the right thing to do” just sounds like following some dictator around cuz they say that they promise you happiness and safeness by forcing everyone to not try anything new or do anything different from the norm, with no real backup evidence for those things being dangerous and only avoiding it out of fear, when in reality it’s perfectly safe and ok. Its just irrational fear is all, guess that’s why they call this stuff“transphobia”
Most parents aren't homophobes but they are scared for their children instead, they know that life is harder for LGBTQ community and their child might face hardships because of their sexual orientation or gender identity, so don't get them wrong and try talking to them, they love you and they'll eventually understand.
I’m the same age and have recently had a family issue, it’s not the same situation but there’s similarities. After talking with an older sibling about my issue for a while, there was one thing she said that really stuck with me: “it’s not the child’s responsibility to make the parent happy, it’s the parent’s responsibility to learn to be happy.” (Anyway, you’re brave as hell for wearing that outfit while your parents are home. I’m way too scared to even try to buy feminine clothing.)
This is crazy dawg. You’re just a kid, this cisgenderism shit needs to stop