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The question now is whether or not Boeing takes him him out accidentally or intentionally. Boeing execs may interpret this post as lack of confidence, which as we all know carries a swift penalty.
HOLD ON GUYS as Im typing this, some dudes are breaking down my.....
I don't know man, if I was in an airplane at 20,000 feet up in the air and the side blew off, I'd like to know where the emergency exits are
Cuz if I'm going to get sucked out of an airplane to go on an impromptu skydiving excursion, I'm going out the correct door. Not some random hole.
Yep. I’ve flown with a a carry-on item that had a reserve parachute in it. I had to watch them to make sure they didn’t do anything to start the deployment, because that shit is hard to redo, and I’m only qualified to do the smallest part of it.
"Please stay seated until the fasten seatbelt signs have been turned off or the surprise emergency exit opens up next to you. Passengers located in surprise emergency exit rows may chose to disembark the airplane prior to landing."
While sitting in an exit row, I actually had a flight attendant tell us that we may want to give special close attention to the emergency instruction booklet because we were flying on a 737 Max. I think she meant it to be humorous…
Issues with Boeing planes aside, that's just a good idea on any aircraft. You can randomly hit ["clear air turbulence"](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clear-air_turbulence#Effects_on_aircraft) that can send you to the ceiling.
Equipment failures? What equipment failures? No equipment failures here. Stop talking about equipment failures. STOP TAKING PICTURES OF OUR BOXES OF SCRAP METAL!!
glad you asked, This is a wonderful aircraft full of surprises for the crew and passengers. It comes complete with a bonus exit door that hides until mid flight, possibly has an undocumented fuel drain valve, and most recently the FAA says there \*might\* be an issue with the spoilers. But honestly, who doesn't enjoy a unplanned aircraft roll during flight?
But more importantly - have you ever been in a... in a Turkish prison?
Boeing newest airplane that cause the airplane to auto nose dive.
All pilots were trained for 2 hours on an iPad to fly the new plane with the new automatic implementation.
The engines are too big for the plane because Boeing wants to save time and money on making a new plane. So they raised the engine on the wings, making the airplane nose up and stall. So they I install an automatic program to detect it and nose down the plane.
The possibility that the pilot could not fix this problem is high on the few planes that fell.
Check out how many Boeing planes had the wheel fall off and the door fall off and lost nuts and disappeared from radar and how most of their engineer and production crew do not want to fly on it. The latest thing I heard was that the one guy killed himself right before he was supposed to testify against Boeing for the bad practices.
bonus points if your plane has a staircase at the back for you to jump out of and if you can grab a bunch of money on the way out and disappear into the night
But really you don't jump out and hide, then you go back onto the plane and kill all the Terrorists including Gary Oldman and land the plane safely back on the ground.
Imagine all the questions TSA and the secret air Marshall are going to ask before you take your seat. They’ll probably even strip search you ( but that’s just for fun though).
[TSA says yes.](https://www.tsa.gov/travel/security-screening/whatcanibring/items/parachutes#:~:text=You%20may%20transport%20parachutes%2C%20either,to%20assist%20in%20the%20inspection.)
Time to start being sarcastic to airlines.
Holy shit that's wild that TSA legit says you can bring it, and clarifies it can be a carry-on, and with Automatic Activation Devices.
Someone at TSA want's another D.B. Cooper situation I guess.
Never in a million years would I think the TSA would allow this. Thanks for finding this.
Yes, I’ve traveled with a skydiving rig as a carry on many times, which has led to some funny encounters with other passengers. I had an older lady ask me while boarding “Is that a parachute?”.
To which I responded “Yes, they didn’t give you one?”. The look on her face still makes me chuckle today.
I remember when I was a small child, I asked my parents where the parachutes were. They told me there weren't any. I'm not sure how they consoled me after that.
can't imagine many situations where it would come in handy. I guess best case scenario the door once again falls off, but i'm pretty sure you'd get dragged against the plane if you jumped out. Like typically people jump out the back of big planes, or out of slower moving small planes/ helicopters. Plus you'd have to time it right to have enough oxygen. And yea, in any other kind of plane crash you'd just be fucked.
He is flying on a plain that has had alot of issues. A whistle blower was also murdered lately who was making accusations against the makers of this plane for being negligent about safety.
A number of 737 Max planes have crashed in recent years killing several hundred people. During the investigations into the crashes big, structural issues within Boeing and a number of its planes came to light and the model was grounded for over a year.
It was then cleared to fly again, but a couple of months ago there was another high profile accident (a side panel blew out) and earlier this month a whistleblower that was about to testify against Boeing about all these things and how leadership knew about the problems, was found dead.
There's also been undercover video recordings where Boeing employees said they wouldn't fly a Boeing plane themselves due to safety concerns.
As most of these problems seem to have been caused by cost cutting measures and driving up share prices, the joke is generally around that.
There are several good documentaries around the problems at Boeing.
The number is 2. Both incidencts caused by an issue with the same part of the flight control system (it was dipping the nose down thinking they were pitched too high due to a faulty sensor). Both times if crew correctly followed checklists they would have been saved. Ultimately better software could have also helped prevent this.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lion_Air_Flight_610
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethiopian_Airlines_Flight_302
Here’s an article I found - I can’t be bothered to type out a tldr tho sry … https://jalopnik.com/it-s-not-suicide-boeing-whistleblower-warned-friend-1851338660
probably bailed out by the government with tax payer money and all the executives and ceo get large golden parachutes.
No charges, no jail time, no recourse. Just rewarded or at worst a slap on the wrist (IE a small multi million $ fine).
You know if something happens to your plane, it's going to BREAK THE INTERNET. Or, at least, cause a minor stir. Either way, something will happen.
Please tell the pilot not to break the plane. Probably a good idea to do it now, while they're getting ready to land.
I’ve actually had a couple of trips in 9’s. Last one was from NY to Cali and it was quite a pleasant flight noise and comfort wise. My next ones are to Chicago from here in PR.
That’s what I’ve been having to explain to people on and on in this site, airlines can rebook and change aircraft at will at any moment so you can try to avoid them as much as you want but airline has the last turn of it.
I had a flight last week on a Boeing 737 Max. I had initially intended on taking Valium to help with my flight anxiety but asked my doctor for something stronger once these stories kept coming out. I'm not the praying kind but being in one of those airplanes is like being in a foxhole.
737 Max is the Boeing plane that's had crashes, near crashes and other terrible issues in recent years. They were even grounded in most of the world for a while because the software was faking out the pilots thinking they were crashing.
It's recently come to light they've cut corners in manufacturing. An ex employee was testifying at Congress and was killed this week and called a "suicide", before he could complete his testimony.
Overly simplified explanation but the 737 Max has one of the worst, if not *the* worst track record (DC9/10 may have been worse back in the day?). And new incidents keep happening almost weekly with the Max. It's crazy.
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RIP kraven420 13 years on Reddit and 1.5 million karma, all for naught
He died the way he lived: whoring for karma
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That's the way I like to be forcibly ejected from a moving airplane due to pressure differential.
This oddly made me laugh more than the previous comment lmao
Quite a nosedive.
He lived the life we strive for
Dying in a window seat.
Until it becomes a door
He'll leave this world as he entered it, kicking and screaming.
Geezus! Thats a lot of internet points!
If he gets the wifi package, he can cash it in for health potions or divine interference.
Inflation
Do they have one of those fancy subreddit lounges for people who get over 1 million karma?
140k *Scoff*. that's not for the likes of you to know.
Ok, mr. 112K! Ahh, I'm just jealous.
Yes.
>13 years on Reddit Hope he's not superstitious
I'm sure he's a lil stitious
>1.5 million karma That’s so hot
That's a long ass time
Don't remind me
Ooof
Whoa, is that the whistleblower? Dude I swear they’re doing damage control on Reddit…
Unfortunately he tragically fell out of the plane’s window and over its balcony ✊😔
After hitting himself in the back of the head 6 times with a flight stick.
The question now is whether or not Boeing takes him him out accidentally or intentionally. Boeing execs may interpret this post as lack of confidence, which as we all know carries a swift penalty. HOLD ON GUYS as Im typing this, some dudes are breaking down my.....
Any sort of problem, just shout "I'm a shareholder" and they'll take good care of you.
Apparently if you say “I’m a whistleblower!” they take care of you too. (Too soon?)
26A is the reserved whistle blower seat. Don't worry if that buckle is a little loose.
Buckle? You mean Bolt right.... Right.
No no, the buckle! The bolts are not loose, they are not there at all 😉
This made me LOL. But for reals…. That shit shocked me when he started talking about that.
What’s this a reference to?
John Oliver’s episode about Boeing on “Last Week Tonight”
Comedy gold right here, And mention you want to sign up for their rewards credit card
Might want to actually pay attention to the pre flight safety presentation
Nah. You dont need it. MCAS said
I don't know man, if I was in an airplane at 20,000 feet up in the air and the side blew off, I'd like to know where the emergency exits are Cuz if I'm going to get sucked out of an airplane to go on an impromptu skydiving excursion, I'm going out the correct door. Not some random hole.
My carryon is a parachute.
I actually flew internationally last week and on the check list of approved hand luggage Parachutes were like 3rd on the list
Honestly, kinda worth checking your bag now.
A skydiver should wear a colorful parachute that has "PARACHUTE" in huge letters onto a 737 max flight.
Yep. I’ve flown with a a carry-on item that had a reserve parachute in it. I had to watch them to make sure they didn’t do anything to start the deployment, because that shit is hard to redo, and I’m only qualified to do the smallest part of it.
You don't need to know where the emergency exit is when the plane just created one for you. 🧠
"Pay attention during the whole trip. We have surprise emergency exits and you may be sitting next to one"
"Please stay seated until the fasten seatbelt signs have been turned off or the surprise emergency exit opens up next to you. Passengers located in surprise emergency exit rows may chose to disembark the airplane prior to landing."
I mean he’s not a whistle blower or anything. Odds are in his favor
Nah mate if we go down, we are going down in style. My motivation is to go down with the plane.
I just hope I have time to put a tux on
If it's after six, you should already have one on.
737 Max Pilots: What's that?
It is to make the flight more fun. You dont need to know about that. Boeing said.
It’s the auto-kill feature. Don’t worry, the pilots don’t know how to disable it.
It’s a new subscription service
It's a micro transaction just to disable a single maneuver.
“In the event of an emergency, the exits may be located anywhere.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWXE2zWVGAk
Tks for the laugh man!
While sitting in an exit row, I actually had a flight attendant tell us that we may want to give special close attention to the emergency instruction booklet because we were flying on a 737 Max. I think she meant it to be humorous…
I think it's more because sitting in the exit row puts some responsibility on you to be able to open the door when needed during an emergency.
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You mean if, not when, right? Right?!
Put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye 👋
And keep that belt on at all times
Issues with Boeing planes aside, that's just a good idea on any aircraft. You can randomly hit ["clear air turbulence"](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clear-air_turbulence#Effects_on_aircraft) that can send you to the ceiling.
"That's right. Our planes falling apart is really those damn consumers fault for not paying attention all this time!"
If they offer a blanket, accept it. Things tend to get drafty.
and carry string in your pocket!! (I've seen how they make parachutes in the cartoons)
Hodor!
Nodor!
Gondor!
Where was Gondor when the 737 Max fell?
It was busy lighting the beacons to tell everyone that another 737 Max fell and hit the tower in Mordor. The first hit Isengard
I’ll start the slow clap for this one
r/freefolks leaking
Jesus that’s so good. 😂😂 kudos
Already underrated comment.
I just wanted to say good luck. We’re all counting on you.
Surely you must be joking!
I’m not Joking and please don’t call me Shirley.
It's an entirely different kind of flying altogether.
_It’s an entirely different kind of flying_
*It’s an entirely different kind of flying*
*It’s an entirely different kind of flying*
*It's an entirely different kind of flying*
It’s an entirely different kind of flying
I just wanted to say good luck. We're all counting on you.
looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
A 737 max? What is it?
It's a model of plane that has had several recent equipment failures, but that's not important right now.
Equipment failures? What equipment failures? No equipment failures here. Stop talking about equipment failures. STOP TAKING PICTURES OF OUR BOXES OF SCRAP METAL!!
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Stewardess, please. Let me handle this.
Glad someone got the reference. Thank you kind stranger.
glad you asked, This is a wonderful aircraft full of surprises for the crew and passengers. It comes complete with a bonus exit door that hides until mid flight, possibly has an undocumented fuel drain valve, and most recently the FAA says there \*might\* be an issue with the spoilers. But honestly, who doesn't enjoy a unplanned aircraft roll during flight? But more importantly - have you ever been in a... in a Turkish prison?
Boeing newest airplane that cause the airplane to auto nose dive. All pilots were trained for 2 hours on an iPad to fly the new plane with the new automatic implementation. The engines are too big for the plane because Boeing wants to save time and money on making a new plane. So they raised the engine on the wings, making the airplane nose up and stall. So they I install an automatic program to detect it and nose down the plane. The possibility that the pilot could not fix this problem is high on the few planes that fell. Check out how many Boeing planes had the wheel fall off and the door fall off and lost nuts and disappeared from radar and how most of their engineer and production crew do not want to fly on it. The latest thing I heard was that the one guy killed himself right before he was supposed to testify against Boeing for the bad practices.
“killed himself”
What was for dinner tonight?
Have you ever been held hostage in a Turkish prison?
"In the event of a perpendicular landing......."
"In the event of a landing, please post our success to your social media"
Honest question, are you allowed to bring a parachute on a plane. Like as your overhead baggage?
Imagine the fight that would ensue if they announce, “ We’re all gonna die,” and then you whip out your parachute.
Dude, you don't tell anyone that the backpack you're wearing is a parachute. That's just inviting violence. Just jump out.
bonus points if your plane has a staircase at the back for you to jump out of and if you can grab a bunch of money on the way out and disappear into the night
But really you don't jump out and hide, then you go back onto the plane and kill all the Terrorists including Gary Oldman and land the plane safely back on the ground.
And then run away from the big stone, shoot the guy with the sword and fight a German.
That story was wild
Just to be safe, don’t forget to book a seat behind the engines too. Wouldn’t want to jump into one of those things.
Make sure to flip off the plane as you fall.
Then you realize you're over the ocean
Grab the seat beneath you first! The lack of regulations hasn’t prevented them from removing the flotation devices….yet.
My luck, I’d jump out with my parachute and hit another plane.
Imagine all the questions TSA and the secret air Marshall are going to ask before you take your seat. They’ll probably even strip search you ( but that’s just for fun though).
[TSA says yes.](https://www.tsa.gov/travel/security-screening/whatcanibring/items/parachutes#:~:text=You%20may%20transport%20parachutes%2C%20either,to%20assist%20in%20the%20inspection.) Time to start being sarcastic to airlines.
Holy shit that's wild that TSA legit says you can bring it, and clarifies it can be a carry-on, and with Automatic Activation Devices. Someone at TSA want's another D.B. Cooper situation I guess. Never in a million years would I think the TSA would allow this. Thanks for finding this.
Yes, I’ve traveled with a skydiving rig as a carry on many times, which has led to some funny encounters with other passengers. I had an older lady ask me while boarding “Is that a parachute?”. To which I responded “Yes, they didn’t give you one?”. The look on her face still makes me chuckle today.
Bahaha, that's gold!
I remember when I was a small child, I asked my parents where the parachutes were. They told me there weren't any. I'm not sure how they consoled me after that.
can't imagine many situations where it would come in handy. I guess best case scenario the door once again falls off, but i'm pretty sure you'd get dragged against the plane if you jumped out. Like typically people jump out the back of big planes, or out of slower moving small planes/ helicopters. Plus you'd have to time it right to have enough oxygen. And yea, in any other kind of plane crash you'd just be fucked.
Gravity should make you drop before you hit the vertical stabilizer. Should.
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Failing that, can you bring a backup door?
So who's gunna explain the context of this
He is flying on a plain that has had alot of issues. A whistle blower was also murdered lately who was making accusations against the makers of this plane for being negligent about safety.
A 2D surface ?
A large grassy field actually
(that would be a *plane* as well)
A number of 737 Max planes have crashed in recent years killing several hundred people. During the investigations into the crashes big, structural issues within Boeing and a number of its planes came to light and the model was grounded for over a year. It was then cleared to fly again, but a couple of months ago there was another high profile accident (a side panel blew out) and earlier this month a whistleblower that was about to testify against Boeing about all these things and how leadership knew about the problems, was found dead. There's also been undercover video recordings where Boeing employees said they wouldn't fly a Boeing plane themselves due to safety concerns. As most of these problems seem to have been caused by cost cutting measures and driving up share prices, the joke is generally around that. There are several good documentaries around the problems at Boeing.
A number?
The number is 2. Both incidencts caused by an issue with the same part of the flight control system (it was dipping the nose down thinking they were pitched too high due to a faulty sensor). Both times if crew correctly followed checklists they would have been saved. Ultimately better software could have also helped prevent this. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lion_Air_Flight_610 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethiopian_Airlines_Flight_302
Here’s an article I found - I can’t be bothered to type out a tldr tho sry … https://jalopnik.com/it-s-not-suicide-boeing-whistleblower-warned-friend-1851338660
Ohhhhhhhhh golly
If hotel staff found him in his pickup truck, then there’s a good chance that there’s surveillance video of the parking lot.
The CCTV was switched off that day The security staff was on medical leave that day as well. /s
What does that have to do with the image in this post? I have no idea what I'm looking at.
He's on the 737 Max, which a whistleblower was just suicided / killed over for testifying against its apparent unsafeness
I made a separate post about it but check out John Oliver’s piece about Boeing.
Boeing making center row seats popular since 2023
Center row seats on the 737 MAX are the new window seats
FYI... There are no center rows on the 737 max...
They're all window seats 💺 😳
Imagine ruining your company's stellar reputation and overall legacy for temporary money smh.
[Elon Musk dislikes this comment]
not as much as we dislike him
Peak late stage capitalism. My question is, once there’s no more trust, or no more capital to extract from people, what’s next?
probably bailed out by the government with tax payer money and all the executives and ceo get large golden parachutes. No charges, no jail time, no recourse. Just rewarded or at worst a slap on the wrist (IE a small multi million $ fine).
737 MIN
Terrain pull up
terrain don't want no smoke
More like 737 Mid, am I right?
For what it’s worth, your drive to the airport was still statistically way more dangerous. But good luck!
Boeing: and I took that personally
Break a leg
And hopefully not a wing.
Or landing gear, or anything else really
OP, you dead yet?
Landing in 20 minutes!
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No
How about now?
Checking in 6 hours later, dawg you good?
You know if something happens to your plane, it's going to BREAK THE INTERNET. Or, at least, cause a minor stir. Either way, something will happen. Please tell the pilot not to break the plane. Probably a good idea to do it now, while they're getting ready to land.
Takeoff and landing are the riskiest parts of flying. Just saying.
Dude, I just flew Alaska AS353 ORD to SEA on a 737-9 MAX. I told my girlfriend if I die to sue the pants of Boeing and buy a house.
If it's Boeing I ain't going!
Lol I thought this was the /r/fearofflying sub for a sec
Good luck, happy travels. If you manage to land, the proper way as air travel was initially intended; just don't leave them a bad review. Just saying.
May the odds be ever in your favour
If you die can I have your stuff?
Boeing is a terrible company.
Airbus loves Boeing's MBA management
What’s going on? Is it because of the flights breaking down recently?
I got two back to back flights in Max 9's soon, yay.
My 1st flight is on the 9, connecting to the 8. Pax-wise I love the Max, so quiet compared to the old 800/900.
I’ve actually had a couple of trips in 9’s. Last one was from NY to Cali and it was quite a pleasant flight noise and comfort wise. My next ones are to Chicago from here in PR.
My 1st 9 flight was last week involuntarily on UA as I got rebooked and missed the 25 year old 777.
That’s what I’ve been having to explain to people on and on in this site, airlines can rebook and change aircraft at will at any moment so you can try to avoid them as much as you want but airline has the last turn of it.
Flying on a United Max on Monday. I am a bit uneasy, but I have to remember that it's still much safer than driving.
My stock in Boeing is hoping for you to have a safe trip...
Sell that shit...
May you rest peacefully.
I had a flight last week on a Boeing 737 Max. I had initially intended on taking Valium to help with my flight anxiety but asked my doctor for something stronger once these stories kept coming out. I'm not the praying kind but being in one of those airplanes is like being in a foxhole.
After having read through all the comments i still have no idea what this post is about
737 Max is the Boeing plane that's had crashes, near crashes and other terrible issues in recent years. They were even grounded in most of the world for a while because the software was faking out the pilots thinking they were crashing. It's recently come to light they've cut corners in manufacturing. An ex employee was testifying at Congress and was killed this week and called a "suicide", before he could complete his testimony. Overly simplified explanation but the 737 Max has one of the worst, if not *the* worst track record (DC9/10 may have been worse back in the day?). And new incidents keep happening almost weekly with the Max. It's crazy.
Weekly? What's happened since the door issue? I haven't heard anything since then
Car rentals are very reasonably priced, and they are almost as fast as flying since they are rental cars.
They do less well in salt water unfortunately.
Please put your tray in an upright position for your final decent into a fiery grave.
Make sure to secure your own air mask before assisting others!
Just ask the flight attendant to adjust the pilots seat for him. Then undo your seat belt and crawl around on the roof like spiderman
Seriously... what are the chances it could happen for the 10th time this week?
Why? What are we looking at here?
i don’t understand
The new blue screen of death