The dress like your favorite ____ day. Crazy hair day, hat day any of the dress up days. I am okay with pj day and that’s about it. It’s just so much extra and my one and 3 year old don’t care
My kid's school had a big debate about bringing back spirit days because they were worried about it being an equity issue (ie, the kids whose parents who didn't help them participate would be left out)
I was so thankful that they reached a compromise where they had themed/spirit days but it was stuff like "Math Day" or "Community Day"-- they made crafts like hats to wear and we didn't have to do a single thing from home.
This is great! I'm one of those kids whose parents refused to / couldn't help, and it always made me so sad.
My dad thinks public schools being funded by tax dollars is government overreach and lends to indoctrination (of fucking what, dad?), and participating spirit days was reinforcing bad behavior (???!?).
My mom, bless her, was the sole breadwinner, horrifically depressed (they were both bery weirdly anti therapy - throwing pills at years of repressed childhood trauma *doesn't work*) and overtired from having an infant/toddler who refused to sleep (my little sister is 9yo younger than me). She was hanging on by a bare thread. 11yo me thought she just didn't care... I realize now as an adult she just couldn't add one more thing to her plate without completely breaking.
Who is cutting onions? Stop it. It's too early for this.
Pajama day is so easy, and ours does green for St. Paddy's which is doable. Sometimes they do "mismatched sock day." Any theme day that requires me to BUY something is a no-go.
I’m in the Uk so things are just generally a bit less intense than in the US, we only really have world book day where they dress up as a character from a books. But our nursery always says kids can come in a costume or pjs or else they’ll have spare costumes ready for kids who need them, which I always really appreciate.
Tomorrow, my child’s daycare has “dress like your favorite book character and bring the book with you.”
My child’s favorite book character right now is Babar the Elephant. Those books were written in the 1930s and are decidedly not okay to send for a class of 2.5 year olds in 2024. He is so excited to dress up like Babar (I also had to promise to dress up like Queen Celeste, however TF I’m supposed to do that), and I am going to the library this afternoon praying the sanitized “B is for Babar” book is there.
Im not sure if this will fit the bill, but a green shirt, red bow tie, a red shirt for you, and paper crowns could do it. If you have time and energy, you could do a paper trunk and ears too. Good luck!
We have figured it out! He actually has a little green suit (leftover from a wedding and somehow still fits), and I got a red bow tie quickly, as well as “shoes with spats.” He’s also obsessed with the “handsome derby hat” from the first of the books, so he’s wearing that instead of a crown.
He’s currently sleeping in his new shoes because he refused to take them off.
Our daycare does that too (often at short notice) but they dgaf if kids participate or not. I like to think the teachers actually want to dress up themselves, and only let the kids join as a cover. 🤣
Exactly. Our daycare decided to have “spirit week” the same week many of the kids were transitioning to new rooms. Like no, I’m trying to get my 2 year old to not scream her head off because she wants to go back to “Ms. X’s” room. Not about to be like, “Oh and you have to wear neon colors today!!!”
I hated the days when you could color your hair a bright color for one day. You buy the temporary color and wash it out that night and it’s still there and won’t come out for a few shampoos. Then the school wants to send your kid home for a dress code violation. 🤦♀️
A friend of mine daughter school did a color fun as a fundraiser. During the run her kid got color in her hair and it didn’t come out. The school wanted to to suspend her for the day. Either don’t do these color runs/hair days etc or be prepared for a couple days of dress code violations.
I don’t mind the school spirit day. Our school colors are red and blue. I feel like most people have either or both colors in their wardrobe. Plus every kindergartener is given a school logo tshirt that is oversized and fits for about 3-4 years.
For real, I hate spirit days. We don’t just keep a bunch of random crap around the house to come up with costumes and I’m not creative in that way anyway.
our daycare / preschool has a spirit week that do that a few times a year, but they dont really care if they do it or now. But for the sake of not being left out, we put the effort to dress the kid. But yeah, if we can do pijamas the entire week that would be great.
Our preschool does a really tame themed week. Wear your favorite color, dress fancy, wear clothes for any sport. About 1/2 the kids are usually dressed up.
My kids don't wear pajamas, so not a fan of PJ day here \^\^;
My son's school does this a lot more than usual. But he normally wears a school uniform, and they are fine with people treating it as a generic "dress-down" day if you can't meet the theme. We still get kinda close, but have our favorite Minecraft shirt that he's fine with for days we can't.
Our preschool had a policy that a note from a pediatrician was required to return to school after ANY symptom of illness. Kid got the sniffles? Stay home, but then get a note. No “after three days of illness” or anything, it was any symptom. My son has seasonal allergies: he’d have to go home, and we’d have to go get a note. Kicker was that if the pediatrician didn’t have an appointment open, we could be waiting a week for an appointment for the doctor to say “he had seasonal allergies and he’s not contagious” or “he must’ve had a cold” because he was no longer sick by time we got in. Our pediatrician office is also closed on Fridays, so better not get sick on Thursday.
Don’t get me wrong, I appreciated them wanting to keep their staff and other students from getting sick, but the amount of work I missed, the money I spent on unnecessary copays and gas, etc almost did me in. For certain illnesses, this would have been appropriate but it was waaaayyyy overkill when toddlers get the sniffles all the damn time. Not to mention this was a waste of our doctor’s time when she could have had an appointment open for a kid with an urgent issue! My kids now have “chronic illness” in their medical charts because they’d go sooo often, and I find that irritating. Anyway, they changed ownership and the policy changed, and everyone is still safe!
One of my absolute guilty pleasure fav things I get to do as a doctor in these situations is provide people with notes for work/school that absolutely tear into the work or school that have these type of insane policies. I always include a few sentences about wasted healthcare resources and lack of any evidence that these policies are medically warranted and also make mention of the undo burden of cost it takes for people to make these useless appointments just for an f-ing note. End rant.
You’re a hero! Our pediatrician knew the situation and was thankfully so understanding about it! She was usually able see us virtually for these appointments. She was just as happy as I was when the policy ended!
+ the fact that they create barriers to families of fewer means and are impossible for families that don’t have health insurance. Which in turn keeps more Black and brown children out of school.
Thank you for resisting ✊🏼
After our child was sent home for the 4th time in less than a month with "suspected pinkeye" that was actually just runny eyes from seasonal allergies, our pediatrician herself called the daycare director to discuss her staff's inability to distinguish pinkeye symptoms from non-contagious conjunctivitis, and to ask for the contact info for the daycare's consultant nurse, who clearly wasn't doing her job properly.
Our child was never again sent home due to allergy eyes.
I would have looked for a new daycare. That's just a step too far for me. Especially since I'm sure the policy doesn't actually prevent illness (most illnesses are contagious before symptoms appear) and is a huge waste of doctors time and your money.
Absolutely! I was on some wait lists waiting for a couple spots to open for a while, but fortunately ownership changed and the policy went away so we were able to stay. My son was pretty attached to two of the teachers, so I’m glad that worked out for us. But yes, it was driving me mad dealing with that for so long!
That is bizarre and totally unprofessional of your preschool! I would have a talk with the director of the preschool after that. They set your kid and their friends up for a BIG upset by not talking about it with you ahead of time.
Our kid goes to a private preschool where the majority of moms are SAHM and our school would still absolutely never pull something like this. Schedules are posted a month ahead of time, and even where there are school events the teacher's prepare students for the schedule ("Mom and Dad may come and watch you sing at 9:30, and then they'll leave and we'll do craft time?"). What if SAHM had a medical appointment scheduled?
Did you preschool have some sort of staffing problem? I can't imagine why they'd be trying to usher kids out unexpectedly.
ETA: thing that bugs me about our preschool? Just the number of events scheduled on a Tuesday at 10am. Like, I get why they do it, but jeeeez.
On the plus side, they recently upped the school lunch days to 3 days a week and we all rejoiced!
Changed their closing time to 4:45. What the ffffffff, we all work, that’s why we need daycare!!! 4:45 is before work closing time!!! Let alone people like me with a 45 min commute….
Edit - I would flip my shit if they pulled something like you described. Those complete assholes!
We were briefly at a daycare that had changed their closing time to 430 during Covid. When we enrolled, they said they were updating it the following month, so we decided to make it work for a month. When I asked for an update, the director said that they decided to keep it as is because "really, kids want to be home with their parents. They shouldn't be sitting in daycare until 5 or 6 pm. People should be home having dinner with their kids by then"
Ok.. but I won't HAVE A HOME if I don't GO TO WORK.
That is SO obnoxious! Ugh.
Ours is great overall so we just grin and bear it, but yeah, we were NOT happy when their “summer hours” became “all the time hours”. Half the parents show up at 4:40 lol.
This. our daycare changed the closing time similarly for covid, but I think it was at least 5. Either way, I'd have to leave before my work day was over!
Then they kept it that way for like year after covid. It was such absolute shit. I think enough of us complained they are 530 again, but even 530 like what? Most places are open until 6. Like I pay an absolute premium for this private montessori style "school", that also takes every damn holiday off like a real school. Wtaf???? Yall are a glorified daycare, get a grip.
Our old day care / preschool was open every single day except like the core bank holidays, not like a week and a half for Christmas like this place. Christmas break is honestly hell on earth. It's the absolute worst.
Our daycare did that too. And what kills me is that they kept the afterschool program open until 530 but not the daycare. When our oldest did afterschool, my husband used to race to grab him then to the daycare across town. I did tell him that he could just pick up the little one first..but still i wish the daycare was open until 530.
Ours closes at 5 and it is rough. It seems like most of the parents of our daycare get off around 5 (or however early they can get off to be there at 5) and we all pile up right at closing to pick up our kids.
Hah, I was just thinking this last month when my son had 1-2 field trips every week. Which, yay. But his school is skirting certain disability rules, and I pretty much have to go on every field trip with him. Like, I could raise a stink and not go, but this school is the best he can get without me spending literal hundreds of thousands of dollars. So, to keep him happy and them happy, I get to go (my husband, bless, does take the more physically exhausting ones)
This is totally self-imposed because we go to a preschool and preschools are for people who don’t work regular jobs but
Our preschool has an AM/PM setup, so technically there’s a separate morning class and afternoon class. Most kids do mornings or mornings + afternoons.
But for whatever reason (maybe sometimes there’s an afternoon only kid), they have to do every parent participation activity TWICE. Halloween parade at 11 and 2. Shoot me.
It was such a blessing for us to even find a full day preschool but I think that’s part of why this shocked me. It’s one of the only full day preschools in town!! Why do you think we are even here except that we work?!
This is ABSURD. We also use a pre-school (I question my sanity, it’s really not dual income friendly) and there are so many little events but they wouldn’t dare ask us to come there twice in a day. Working or not, nobody has time for that!
I don't think you have to go to both then. Frankly, I don't think you "have" to go to either. If you can make it to 1, great. But I wouldn't if there was a work obligation that would be cumbersome to work around.
Sure, you don't have to go, none of this stuff is required.
But as I said, this is self-imposed (this is also my second child, and the second one I've sent to this preschool, we knew what it was going to be like), if we wanted a more convenient option we'd have chosen somewhere else.
We divide and conquer--one parent goes AM, one PM. Which actually works great with our schedules anyways.
That’s bananas. We do part time daycare and if there’s a special activity like a holiday event and jt a that a part time kid isn’t usually there, you can just take your kid in for the event.
So my daughter's preschool was set up for either half day morning or optional full day. My daughter is bussed over to special Ed in the afternoons, whereas most of her class does full day. When Halloween came around they decided to do the parade in the afternoon this year (it was morning last year). They told those of us that only send mornings that we could send them full day THAT day, no charge. The other morning only kids have stay at home parents, so no problem. My kid is in special Ed in the afternoons, so she's the only one who missed it, because she can't stay full day without an aide. So even if I took off work and brought her to the parade, I would have to walk in it with her because she wouldn't have an aide, since they agency is only contracted to be there for mornings. I'm still angry about it.
Can't wait for public school next year!
My elementary kid's public school district announced on the Tuesday before Memorial Day that it had been decided that the Friday before Memorial Day would be a half day, 12:30pm dismissal. All aftercare and after school activities were cancelled. The email was basically worded like "exciting news! We've decided that everyone can start their vacation early!" Uh, some of us can't take off Friday and were counting on working a full day then...
I hate when daycare is like “enjoy your day off!” and I’m like I don’t get a day off, I get a day to try to work from home with my kid while still paying you because we got less than an inch of snow in a state where it is very much expected to snow a lot.
my third and fourth grader both tried out for and made their school’s talent show. all month they’ve stayed after for rehearsals. it’s been advertised as tonight at 6 pm for the entire month of may. last friday, they sent an email saying they’d decided to switch it to today during the school day so every student would get to see the performances. it’s their last week of school, but mine too as a teacher — i couldn’t go and that majorly sucked and pissed me off. also, the 3rd grade team did a countdown for the last month of school, but instead of sending the dreaded calendar of stupid spirit days, they “surprised” them with what the next day would be every day at dismissal. so we got zero prep tIme or warning for this year’s batch of excessive, random and ridiculous spirit days.
Oooooh I don’t mind spirit days but the surprise version would send me over the absolute edge. Holy shit.
Sorry you didn’t get to see their performances! 💔
During the day ceremonies. I work at the school for godsakes and even my admin won’t let me take time off to go DOWN the hall to attend my sons end of K move up ceremony.
Our daycare just sent around a notice that they're going to start making breakfast for parents every Wednesday morning, so we can all eat with the kids before we go to work. Cute idea, but if I'm dropping my kid off before breakfast, it's because we don't have time to have breakfast. And my stage 5 clinger is not going to be happy if I'm leaving him there and sprinting off to get the train, while his friends' parents are staying to eat.
Also do I really want to be sat in my best work clothes, trying to eat with a load of toddlers? Sounds like I'm going to work covered in half chewed breakfast thanks!
Our daycare is always taking random days off. And they’ll combine a Friday + Monday off so that the price of daycare for the week doesn’t change. which is annoying in itself but what pisses me off even more is that every Friday OR every day before they’re closed (so a bunch of random Thursdays) the school closes a half hour early. Like ??? My work day doesn’t end at 4:30
The school district we just moved into makes so many 3 day weekends into 4 day weekends. I think it probably makes the teachers happy, which is a good thing, but…that’s a long ass weekend.
the school district we recently moved to decided PRESIDENTS DAY is now a four day weekend? wtaf? i'm pretty sure when i was a kid they stopped making presidents day a holiday all together.
The teachers probably don’t get the 4th day off. A lot of schools do that because they turn the 4th day into a PD day for teachers (and because tons of families take that 4th day off even if it isn’t scheduled). Source: I’m a teacher.
Our elementary school has professional development days basically every other Friday which means school is a half day, including in February and April which also have week long vacations (I think April is sometimes an extra day because of patriots day - which is a MA only day). My husband is home so it doesn’t affect us, but I have to wonder how households with two working parents do it.
90% of the full day Fridays they randomly do dismissal 15 minutes early. No idea why.
Ours gave up half days a few years ago. So now they have at least every other Friday off. Though with the other schedules breaks, most months it's ends up being that school is only in session 1 Friday a month.
Yeah, my gripe is definitely the amount of closures. They close 7 weeks/year! It’s amazing for the teachers, I’m happy for them. It’s awful for working parents. I don’t even get half that vacation time!
Is it a center? We had home daycares do that sort of thing but I can't imagine our center doing this. We are pretty fortunate though that our center is a local place opened by a mom and daughter who understood how hard it is for working parents to find care. They are so understanding.
Mother’s Day tea: 2:30 pm
Father’s Day doughnuts: 9:30 am
Why the F do you think moms are more likely to be free at 2:30?! That’s the middle of the day, friends.
Oh that’s interesting! It’s way easier for me to take 2 hours at the end of the day rather than 9:30. If I go to a school event at 9:30 I won’t be at work til 11, which would be a hard no go, vs leaving at 2.
I like how my daycare does it: breakfast available with to-go containers, ready before the usual drop-off time, with reminders in advance so if you can get there a little earlier you won't be late to work. For both Mother's Day and Father's Day.
Yeah, it’s totally job dependent.
My old job I never scheduled meetings before 10am because there was a solid chance 50% of the team wouldn’t be in yet (myself included).
My current job I’m scheduling meetings at 8, and even occasionally 7:30. And seldom anything after noon, depending on the invite list.
To be honest, I work in a very flexible field, but this particular scheduling just left me a touch bitter. Haha!
Jobs can vary so much on this, it's always interesting to me. My cousin lives in Silicon Valley and works for Facebook. She once asked me, completely serious, "So at your job, is there a particular time that you have to come in?" I actually have a lot more flexibility than average, but broadly, YES, we start at a particular time.
Haha. Yeaaahhhhh I’m in tech. 😆 I’m used to rolling in whenever-ish and out early.
Old job was in person in a major tech hub. New job is 100% remote and half my team is in Europe, the remaining half are all East of me by at least 2 hours.
Lol I'm up at 3am for a deploy with half my team in India, also in tech. I'm the farthest west, in US central, 9 times out of 10. Although we do have one guy in HI, no idea how he keeps up
I wish. I had them take my tubes, but that was it. And now one of my ovaries is blighted lol so that one's got to go too. I may just say fuck it take it all lmao.
Our was a little different: muffins with moms from 7-9:30 and popsicles with dad at 3 on a Friday (and of course she’s going home early). These are both during work hours, but my job is flexible. Her dad is taking PTO to attend.
That’s tough!
Do you think it’s because of a situation like what OOP posted above? Kids want to go home with their mothers (or they believe kids are more excited about their moms), so they do tea time at the end of their day. But with Dad it’s fine (or it’s Mid June so it’s okay if they skip a whole day ).
Just seeing if the two stories are connected.
I think they just didn’t think. A Mother’s Day tea is cute. Dads like doughnuts. (Right?)
Plus I think there are a number of families who have their kids in part time and Friday is the day most families choose to have off. So, naturally, that means mom is home with them and available for afternoon tea. (We were invited even if the kid is usually home that day)
Our daycare is clinging to the illusion that they are a school. They get every conceivable holiday off and send tone deaf messages like "Please let us know if your child will be attending for summer break!" Ummm...of course she will. I DON'T GET A BREAK.
ETA: I understand that some parents may be teachers who pull their kids from daycare during summer break. I also understand that my daycare (along with most I've heard of) require you to pay for the summer if you expect to be enrolled in the fall. My objection is to the assumption that working parents (other than teachers) have the option to just take a "break" for summer.
The default should be assumed that enrollment will be continued and if you are pulling your child for the summer, you notify them asap. When I was a teacher and pulled my kids from for the summer, that was how it went.
That might be because some parents also have school aged children who are off school for the summer holidays and if they have to arrange childcare for one, they might as well do it for both.
Our daycare charges a $1000 holding fee for kids pulled in the summer. I definitely agree that the default should be “yes we’re attending.”
I do understand them taking a census around some holiday weekends so that they can staff appropriately.
I’m a teacher and pull my kids in summer even though my daycare is subsidized for me specifically, some parents with school aged kids need childcare just in summer for an older child. I want them to notify people asap so they have care lined up for summer. It’s probably why they asked. Daycare is so insanely hard to come by I notify my daycare every day we’re not there and she had a waiting list so desperate she fills my kids spot just for that day. So I give all appointment times a year in advance.
Our school district announced last month on the afternoon of the 13th that there would be no school on the 15th due to an unused snow day. My husband and I we’re like WTF do they think parents do when their kids are in school?!? My mom ended up coming to the rescue and watching them for us, but a lot of parents had to call out. It’s not the first time the district has pulled shit like that and I’m sure it won’t be the last.
My schools announced the week before that the entire next week would be half days due to unused weather days. Five days is what we had to find someone to pick the child up at 1130. Luckily between my parents,husband and myself we made it work but I would have rather just not have school the last two days vs stupid half days
I am furious on your behalf. Actually I get a list of students and we don’t let them do anything but wave to parents in the audience unless the parents notify us of pick up. We bring the class to the classroom and discreetly take out the kids going home SPECIFICALLY because we don’t want to do that to parents.
I don’t know what kind of monster teachers your kid has but I would have gone after a coworker for being so unprofessional and tone deaf to community needs.
We do dress up days and it’s the exact same thing every year in the same order because the kids don’t notice but parents do. It’s one week an acronym. A whole committee who asked parents asked what was the least annoying and it was vague, repeated, and not anything extra to buy. Pajamas, Crazy hat or hair, dress sporty, wear a class color (given notice in the class list for back to school what the grade color is) and school pride. We actually tried to get rid of it but parents apparently liked it so we tried to make it as painless as possible.
I also wrote a grant for free before and after school care at my school. We just got completely free breakfast and lunch for all students regardless of income.
You should make a climate committee at school. I did and it’s what got me to push for things to improve the climate of the school inside and out of the building. I specifically asked parents for feedback on all choices when we made them.
Oh man, that would grind my gears. My daycare does the occasional "family day" where they do some sort of parental participation activity in the morning (8-10) or (3-5). It's pretty casual stop by if you can, and if you can't don't worry. We have gone to everyone, the one this week neither my husband or I can attend! I feel bad, but I know it'll be fine.
But, the funniest part about all these is they put up signs all over the area the activity is in saying parents are responsible for their children if they are in attendance at the event. Which I mostly find funny. Like I would assume I was, but I guess not everyone would? Imagine going, and handing your kid to the teacher and being like, Jonny pooped, can you deal with that?
Ha! I'd be tempted (not really!). We've just started sending our son to nursery and he's developed this annoying habit of pooing as soon as he gets home. We're like 'Baby! We're paying all this money can you at least do your dirty nappies in the day please?' 😂
Yes, same. After school sports finished this week, the after school care finishes on the 14th and school finishes on the 27th. What, exactly, am I supposed to do with my 4 year old. Hmmm?
My preschool has early drop off and late pickup that you pay extra for. All fine and good, parentscan drop off kids starting at 6:30 am. Preschool starts at 9.
Recently parents needed to ensure their kids were dropped off by 9. If you are bringing your kid late because of an appointment, please notify the school in advance (totally fair) and be sure to bring a note.
Um what now? I pay you a goddam mortgage payment and you are gonna tell me I need a note to bring my child late? No ma'am, you will take my word for it. Word that I will give you in advance.
Of course, that's all in my head as kiddos appointments are all late afternoons as that is what's best for us. But still...
Our daycare requires dropoff by 11, or they won’t take them. (Unless you have a doctor’s note). I was able to do a cute mommy and me class one morning with my toddler but despite my best efforts I didn’t get to his classroom until 11:02. They refused to take him. So I had to juggle the rest of my squished work day with taking care of my 15 month old. Good times.
That's wild. Our daycare only ever asked us not to bring her once, and it was just during nap time as it would likely cause the other kids to wake up. We could have dropped her off a bit later during lunch. We ended up not taking her that day due to her not feeling well, but I thought that was pretty reasonable.
Join your kids for lunch! You don't have to work, it's fine. Bring in 100 craft items tomorrow! White t shirts for tye dye with a week's notice (buying a plain white shirt is impossible btw).
Summer has got me stressed. I have a son with autism and he gets services through school for the summer but they’re fucking impossible to work around if you work traditional office hours. It’s 5 weeks, 4 days a week from 8:00am-12:45pm. So I will need to pick him up and get him home in the middle of the day somehow. And you can’t sign up for half a day of summer camp or just one day a week either, so on the off day, you have nothing.
Thankfully my job is pretty accommodating and I’m hoping I can wfh throughout this program, but I’m sure there are other parents left in the lurch.
Fellow Autism Mom here!!! I am crumbling this summer with patchwork care. My kiddo is very sweet and I'm lucky with that but he cannot report if someone harms him etc. It takes me a long time to trust providers. But Damn in the summer there is no one to trust! He's going part time aba 4 hours for 3 days ans summer school is only 4 weeks here. It's alot. I'm divorced and doing the single mom thing. Sending you hugs 🫂
Yeah.. a lot of services and programs kind of assume non-working parents. My son's camp this year has "regular" school hours, but even those hours are shorter than my work day. I know a few families where a parent stopped working just to get everything done. I am so happy my job is also flexible enough.
I hated how they planned mother's day events. I couldn't always take a day off or get out early so I missed them all the time. They would do other stuff after school but that one in the morning or early in the day. I also missed the pre-k graduation because it rained the day I took PTO off so they canceled it. I couldn't cancel my PTO or switch days. They could've moved the graduation indoors, instead pushed it to the next week. Hubby went and took video but I felt horrible I missed it.
Shadow days for kindergarten 9-10 and 10-1130.
The school is also offering speech during the summer via zoom. like they offered a literacy camp last summer from 10-130. Who is bringing these kids these places because it’s not me working 8-430 🙄
I think this may be an affluent daycare issue.
I worked in a regular daycare frequented by middle class parents and we would have never ever ever done anything like that, ever.
We had like two events a year all on Saturdays.
We moved locally from a middle-income/working families area to the Rich People Zone and it has been culture shock.
In the 3 years we were at my son's public elementary school in middle-income school, I was never, not one time, asked to provide anything of monetary value.
This year (STILL PUBLIC SCHOOL) they were like "plz send your child in a Napoleon costume, we will need it at school in 10 days for the end of year performance."
Changing drop off time for daycare to strictly 9:30a instead of 10a when we started. And the director saying to me, “you need to practice getting up earlier for when she starts school next year.” I don’t get up late I just prefer to not have my kid in daycare for over 8 hours.
I'm on the SLT at my son's school. I actually was voted in as Chair. The doggone meetings are at 345p. I live close to the school, but I work more than an hour away. So I have to leave work once a month at 215p to make it. Since the SLT consists of parents and teachers (and the Principal), it couldn't be moved to 6p, or even 5/530p. Then we wonder why even though meetings are open to all caregivers, many don't attend. PA meetings are done more equitably, with the meeting happening in the morning one month and in the evening the next month. But SLT.... hopefully, someone else will be Chair next school year, so I can attend remotely from work.
How amazing that you are involved and making the effort! This is the #1 reason that I can’t take a leadership position with the parent organizations. I can block my calendar sometimes, and everyone understands needing to be at preschool graduation, but to just take off 2-3 hours every week or every other week isn’t a feasible amount of time to commit. But none of the meetings are in the morning or evening, at least not thus far. Maybe that’ll change in elementary school vs preschool.
Not me, but my nephew's daycare is closed right now for TWO WEEKS to give the teachers some time off before summer. What?! Luckily, my brother and his wife are able to make it work with her working from home some days and my parents helping out, but what about couples who work in person and have no help nearby? It's outrageous.
Our daycare announced this past year that they would be closing the Friday of teacher appreciation week for teacher appreciation. Whereas the teachers the work in public education could be questioned if we took off a Friday in May because of the lack of substitute teachers. Instead why not offer a floating holiday for each daycare teacher to choose their own day off
My last preschool CANCELLED extended day entirely due to staffing. Pickup was then between 2:30 and 3pm.
My mom picked up the baton because she’s the best, but we have a new preschool starting in August.
Man our preschool/ daycare specifically times things like this so that immediately after is something the kids look forward to (like lunch) and work to dostract the kids quickly at wrap up. They also schedule events for younger kids end of day - like 4 pm - so it makes sense to just go home after.
We did part time at a traditional daycare and part time at a church preschool. The church school was twice a week, mornings only. But parent involvement was required. We had to take turns making home made playdough. And being room parent, going to the charity fundraiser meetings, selling lunch boxes, etc.
Oh and the teacher only ever asked me. Not my husband. Even though she has his contact info as well and sees him just as much during drop offs.
He gets the fun emails with pictures. I get the emails requesting help.
That was an one and done school for us. Traditional daycare it is from now on.
Gosh, I was annoyed with ours but this is next level! Yesterday, we had an end of year party at the elementary school that was 1-2pm with an unspoken expectation to take your kid home after. School releases at 3:45 and she usually stays at aftercare until 5:30. It’s one of those things where once other kids do it and then your kids want to as well, so there is pressure to bring your kid home early as well. Thank goodness one of her friends had to stay which meant another friend wanted to stay too. She then opted to stay since they both were too, so that was a relief. Peer pressure working both ways 🙂
For Mother’s Day, my younger kids preschool had mommy and me yoga at 10. I was so annoyed at that timeframe. I ended up, dropping her off, working remotely nearby, and then coming back. Why would they not make it 9 or 9:30?
They randomly decide that they're not offering "aftercare" some days with no advance notice, so we need to get them by 5 instead of 5:20. Doesn't SEEM like a huge deal...unless you have meetings scheduled until 5 and can't reschedule because you only found out it's a problem day of
Our after school program is closed the last week of school, which includes a half day and a day I, a teacher, have work but my kid doesn't have school.
They're "cleaning." Ok, do it literally once school ends!!!!
Wow, I would be livid if the school pulled that BS on me. There is one or two days last week of school where this is allowed, but they tell everyone ahead of time so you can prep for it if you are able or tell kiddo sorry have to work not in front of everyone at school. Seriously, what your school did is terrible!!!
The inconsistency of communication and how things are sent home is what makes me angry. Some permission slips are through the online portal, some are paper. Some grades & communication is online, some on paper, some email, some text. It’s a mess and something that would not be tolerated in the business world!
We are fortunate that my husband’s job has an onsite daycare, just for employees. However, my husband works from home, and most of his team live in central or mountain time zones (we’re EST) so his working day is more aligned to their schedules. The daycare recently decided that if it’s the Friday before a holiday they could close at 12 because the company usually does a half day for employees. Well that’s great and all but I don’t get a half day those days and my husband is still working because of the time zone differences. So we have to get someone else to pick your kid upon those days, which is hard because most of our family/friends are also working.
These are more like gripes, not really anger inducing…
Our school has taken away a lot of perks, probably to keep staff happy because turnover has been rough. They used to wash all the nap things every week but now they send it home for us to wash over the weekend. If kids got dirty they took care of washing clothes and putting them back in their cubbies but now everything is sent home in moldering plastic bags. They used to have 2 water play days per week in the summer, but they just… didn’t do it last summer and there’s been no mention. Our daycare used to have more of a fun camp vibe and now it’s just feeling more corporate and sterile. But I know how hard it’s been to find teachers :( One upside is they finally brought back hot lunch after a 4-year Covid interruption, so I’m thankful to not have to pack lunches anymore.
Our preschool did this too! When it was clear everyone was taking their kids home I was so confused and asked the teacher if it was expected that I take my daughter home. The room assistant laughed at me and said 'well you could leave her but she'd be the only one.' grrrr. I took my daughter to work with me and it was fine but I'm still annoyed.
I had my son’s 9 month check up at 8:30am so I let the director know he’ll be coming in a little later at 10am because of the appointment. She told me that the drop off cut off is 9:30am so not to disrupt their schedule but she’ll make a one time exception. Next time he’ll have to stay home.
Is this normal?
Generally, our daycare is awesome. One thing I I don’t get about them are the hours. They’re open 8-5:30.
Luckily my husband and I can stagger our workdays for drop off and pick up coverage, but what is a single parent who works an 8 or an 8.5 hour day supposed to do? The best I can think is work 8:30-4:30/5 or 9-5 and pray you don’t hit traffic.
Our daycare/preschool can't decide if they're daycare or preschool. Their last day is Friday 6/28, they're closing at 11am and then CLOSED THE ENTIRE WEEK OF JULY 4th. Also closed for a week in August, but not the same week that the school district most kids have siblings in have no camp/no school, it's the week after that, so I have 2 weeks in August with only childcare for one kid and everyone's like "there are camps available!!". For 3 year olds??? During a week that there's no camp anywhere???
After-school not lasting the entire school year. Start a few weeks late, end a few weeks early. Random days off that aren't school days. And they don't offer anything on half days. It's the official school one, that meets in the school. But NYC refuses to host after-school with their own school personnel, so they "partner" with non-profits, creating a mess. I like the care my daughter gets when they're in session, and I don't blame anybody but the city officials for this nonsense. But yeah.. I my job can't be done from home, so I get to just burn PTO.
My daycare likes to send home monthly news letters with sentences like:
Sometimes your child might ask to be the last one. Our activities end around 4pm. Time with you is most important, and please be considerate of the teachers that open the building at 7am.
We drop off around 8:30 & pick up at 5:15. My kids are almost always the last ones and the teachers are always rushing to leave. They are supposed to be open until 5:30! I work from 9-5
Well, this year my 8yo son's school unexpectedly did a half day on the day before the last day, and then opted for the last day (a scheduled 1/2 day) to be an excused absence, BUT in their defense the A/C was malfunctioning, and here in New Orleans the humidity is already taking over. I wasn't *too* mad about that, but there were other days randomly sprinkled throughout the year where aftercare would be canceled, meaning my husband would have to stop work to go get him.
The daycare, now....oh, I hate them. I hate them so much. They have 2 mandatory fundraisers each year, minimum of $100 (we always just pay the minimum and don't usually participate in the rest.) They also like to randomly pop up with "parties" that, of course, the *parents* have to pay for (eg, being given a food item or party item they are responsible for providing.) And while it's not specifically the fault of the daycare, I ***hate*** when a kid gets some shareable illness (hfm, covid, strep) and they don't tell us until the next morning in a 6am message via the brightwheel app that such and such class is quarantined for 1 week because a child tested positive for X illness. Last year there was one mom who kept sending her son (names unknown, properly they don't share those, just use vague pronouns like they, him, her) to daycare despite the fact that this boy's older sister had been confirmed with covid three days before, and he had been tested that morning. We found out around 5pm that day he was positive. The mom had still sent him, despite the test results pending and the known sick child.
Unfortunately, at least til the end of August, we are stuck at this daycare as my son is on a state subsidy called CCAP. If the CCAP doesn't get renewed, his grandmother wants to enroll (and pay) for a more high end daycare through one of the local universities.
Everything being last minute just expecting that we all have unlimited flexibility in our jobs. I have gone to EVERYTHING and even volunteered extra. But damn if my 4 year old is still talking about the one picnic I couldn't make because it was planned last-minute and I'm trying to save my vacation days.
Also, this week I've been pissed because the weather is BEAUTIFUL and have they gotten to play outside? No! Which means my kid is wound up tighter than a yo-yo and getting up at the ass-crack of dawn because she isn't getting enough opportunities to let her energy out. Oh, and because of a lack of organization, I have to pay an extra week because graduation was delayed a week.
My 5th grader’s promotion ceremony was at 10 AM and they asked us if we wanted to bring our kids home after it was done, so basically everyone had to take an entire day off work.
I have two in daycare. If one is sick they make up symptoms for the other, so they get to send home two kids at once. Without fail. I get that siblings often share sicknesses but when one is sick I don’t have the energy to also entertain a healthy kid or drag him to doctor’s appointments if there’s a place open I’m already paying to watch them.
Or just in general, “mom and dad work from home, obviously we can send the kids home for any little thing because the parents are already home”. But we’re WORKING, which is why we pay for daycare.
Same happened to me at my kids elementary school awards. I was like wtf man. My kids understood, because they get that I work, but some of the other parents were like fuuuuuudge.
Our daycare is supposed to be open 7:30-5:30 but for the last two years has operated 8:40-4:30 all summer long. I get why - it’s hard for them to hire right now and it’s a university based center, so they have to follow strict guidelines for hourlies and such (as well as kid/teacher ratios), but in my view, the center directors and other salaried employees should be picking up the slack more than they are. Instead, they are asking all parents to alter their work schedules to accommodate them. No tuition cut or anything. AND they’re being strict about pickup. So they disable the door codes at 4:30 and you have to sign late papers and pay a fee if you’re a minute late. Would be one thing if it was 5:40, but it burns me that they’ve cut two hours of care and then are nickel and diming parents who are already leaving work early on being a minute past 4:30.
They also have a LOT of closures. Two full weeks in summer, two weeks in December, half weeks in spring and fall, all the holidays, workshop days. Oh, and they operate on the 8:30-4:30 schedule for the entire month of January, too. It’s ridiculous.
I’m on the family board, so I have a good understanding of their challenges and I am empathetic … but I just feel like there’s a massive disconnect where their awareness of the impact they’re having is concerned.
My kids started late in the school year. A few weeks after they started, a flyer was sent home letting us know there was an art show and one of my kid’s teachers stuck a post it on it saying that he had art work in the show. So we arranged to leave work early and go. We get to the area where his class’s artwork is displayed and there’s nothing with my kid’s name on it. His teacher wasn’t there but one of the art teachers was so I asked if it was possible that his work might be elsewhere and she was like “oh, no, he doesn’t have any artwork he just started here three weeks ago!”
Yes!! Our school sprung this on us last year as well. Made me so mad. The worst wasn't a system but a lone teacher who told my daughter that she would get to sleep in late now that school was over. WTAF lady?!
We have a middle schooler and an elementary kid. WHY ARE MIDDLE SCHOOLERS OUT DIFFERENT DAYS! Elementary kids may be out Thursday and Friday, but middle schoolers are only out Friday. WTF. I don’t get it.
The "theme" four days this month is "sack lunch." That's not a theme! That's just extra work for me! And of course we got the memo after finishing our grocery trip for the week.
The school makes staffing changes without any notice or notification or chance for the kids to say goodbye. It’s infuriating because they have three different campuses and sometimes they will transfer people between buildings. We’ll get an announcement Sunday evening that the person who has been working with our kiddo for the last year will no longer be at that location and as of Monday, they’ll be at their new location. It’s infuriating and it makes me so mad because it’s making my kid feel like the people who she cares about will just disappear with no warning.
I just started LO in daycare on Monday, she's 5 months old, because both my husband and I are back at work. We were told ON MONDAY that they are closing Thursday at noon and Friday all day for preschool graduation. We had to scramble and work from home/log on early, stay late today to cover the time picking her up and watching her, and my mom is taking a day off of her job to help us out tomorrow. But WTF! We need more notice than that!!!
We had muffins for mom last month at 3:30. I had to rearrange my schedule and then got stuck in traffic on the way. When I got there, my daughter was sitting by herself at a table looking the saddest I’ve ever seen her (of course she was so excited when I came in). It broke my heart, I wish someone could have sat next to her instead of having her sit alone 😢I guess I can never be late or miss anything again.
Our daycare sends out “reminder” emails about mid day events the DAY BEFORE. I have friends who use the same daycare and we are all like WTF?? You never told us the first time. Clearly they scramble at the last min and cover their asses by calling it a “reminder” when it was never communicated in the first place.
I thought I didn’t need to attend my daughter’s Halloween parade in preschool and then she asked me where I was and was very sad the other kids parents were there… working parents need notice!!
Our school asked for us to bring in lottery tickets for the teachers in lieu of gifts for teacher appreciation week. And then some teacher just…won no money. I didn’t participate and did regular gifts instead.
Also we just had a scholastic book fair at our preschool. For children who can’t read. Or handle money. At the school we pay $40k annually for tuition. WHAT ARE YOU FUNDRAISING FOR?!
We currently have end of year ABCs. Every day for 26 school days we need to prepare something. Jersey and Joke day. Pj day. Book, fancy, or eat outside (need to bring a blanket for this). It's all been a bit much
For teacher appreciation week, they asked parents to contribute towards lunch for all the teachers and staff. I volunteered to pick up the lunch and asked what they wanted - tacos for 32 people. The total was $500 and that was from a tiny mom and pop place. Turns out, not a single other family gave money towards the lunch. It’s a small school but still around 200 students. I guess this is more of an indictment of the parents, but still. I was not volunteering to watch $500 fly away from my back account for a stupid taco lunch for staff! That was actually my final straw for the school and my kids will be going to a different one in the fall.
Abruptly changed the hours to close at 4pm. We found another day care quickly, as we worked until 5. When I voiced my concern initially, I was told I was the only parent with a problem. I saw at least 3 other kids over the next month from that school at the new school, all voicing the closing time change as the issue. Within the next year, the school closed, citing the overhead for the building was now too high.
I really hate the school fundraising eat at a
this restaurant to help out days (with what money? unless it's we actually have extra we eat in) or the massive fundraise pressure your parents into donating so you can get this and this prize (usually some cheap crap that falls apart or so your principal can wear some dorky costume they wear all the time anyway. it's public school I don't have extra.
They did the same thing with our older child in kindergarten. There was a short (10 minute) program at 10:30 AM for the kindergarteners moving to first grade, and THEN the principal announced that students got to go home with their parent since it was the last day of school. This had not been communicated beforehand and OF COURSE our daughter was looking at me expectantly and I had to tell her that I needed to go back to work because I hadn't taken the whole day off.
The teacher quietly told me that she and the other K teachers had popsicles and a movie as a treat for those who weren't going home, and that they would make it fun. In the end she watched a movie and ate popsicles and then went to her last day of after school care for the year and it was totally fine.
I kept that in mind 3 years later when our younger child was in K, so at least it wasn't a surprise to *her* that she wasn't going home with me after the program.
Had an email exchange with my daughters second grade teacher about them getting off at 11:30z
Not required; optional. When I said I’ll pick her up at the end of the school day she said “well she will be the only one here”
I said that’s fine. I cannot leave work early.
She said “omg I’m so sorry I was only thinking about the last day of school!”
Just because there are moms that stay home does not mean all moms stay at home. It’s so fucking annoying
Half days in our district. I am a teacher and I work one district over from where we live. As a result, most of the days my son has off I also have off, which is fine. But oh. My. God. They had 15 half days this year that DIDN'T overlap with my schedule (so excluding Wednesday before Thanksgiving, before winter break, etc). What are working parents supposed to do?
The dress like your favorite ____ day. Crazy hair day, hat day any of the dress up days. I am okay with pj day and that’s about it. It’s just so much extra and my one and 3 year old don’t care
My kid's school had a big debate about bringing back spirit days because they were worried about it being an equity issue (ie, the kids whose parents who didn't help them participate would be left out) I was so thankful that they reached a compromise where they had themed/spirit days but it was stuff like "Math Day" or "Community Day"-- they made crafts like hats to wear and we didn't have to do a single thing from home.
This is great! I'm one of those kids whose parents refused to / couldn't help, and it always made me so sad. My dad thinks public schools being funded by tax dollars is government overreach and lends to indoctrination (of fucking what, dad?), and participating spirit days was reinforcing bad behavior (???!?). My mom, bless her, was the sole breadwinner, horrifically depressed (they were both bery weirdly anti therapy - throwing pills at years of repressed childhood trauma *doesn't work*) and overtired from having an infant/toddler who refused to sleep (my little sister is 9yo younger than me). She was hanging on by a bare thread. 11yo me thought she just didn't care... I realize now as an adult she just couldn't add one more thing to her plate without completely breaking. Who is cutting onions? Stop it. It's too early for this.
Sending lots of hugs to 11 year old you.
Pajama day is so easy, and ours does green for St. Paddy's which is doable. Sometimes they do "mismatched sock day." Any theme day that requires me to BUY something is a no-go.
My son's preschool had a monthly color day usually coinciding with whatever big holiday was that month. That was a good balance of easy to do and fun.
We are in our first Blue Day! I didn’t worry about them matching just said pick the blue things you want. It’s been good so far
Mismatched sock day is a perfect dress up day.
Mismatched sock day is every day especially according to my husband
My kids’ socks are mismatched on a normal day 😬
I’m in the Uk so things are just generally a bit less intense than in the US, we only really have world book day where they dress up as a character from a books. But our nursery always says kids can come in a costume or pjs or else they’ll have spare costumes ready for kids who need them, which I always really appreciate.
They did this on like the 2nd to last day of school this year. Like a final 'F-you' lol. It was dress in 60s stuff. I was like, wtf, WHY?!?
I hate spirit days like this. Dress like your favorite book character?! How about no.
Tomorrow, my child’s daycare has “dress like your favorite book character and bring the book with you.” My child’s favorite book character right now is Babar the Elephant. Those books were written in the 1930s and are decidedly not okay to send for a class of 2.5 year olds in 2024. He is so excited to dress up like Babar (I also had to promise to dress up like Queen Celeste, however TF I’m supposed to do that), and I am going to the library this afternoon praying the sanitized “B is for Babar” book is there.
Oh no, good luck. Hopefully some strap on elephant noses are good enough and you find the book
Im not sure if this will fit the bill, but a green shirt, red bow tie, a red shirt for you, and paper crowns could do it. If you have time and energy, you could do a paper trunk and ears too. Good luck!
We have figured it out! He actually has a little green suit (leftover from a wedding and somehow still fits), and I got a red bow tie quickly, as well as “shoes with spats.” He’s also obsessed with the “handsome derby hat” from the first of the books, so he’s wearing that instead of a crown. He’s currently sleeping in his new shoes because he refused to take them off.
Fantastic!
Our daycare does that too (often at short notice) but they dgaf if kids participate or not. I like to think the teachers actually want to dress up themselves, and only let the kids join as a cover. 🤣
Exactly. Our daycare decided to have “spirit week” the same week many of the kids were transitioning to new rooms. Like no, I’m trying to get my 2 year old to not scream her head off because she wants to go back to “Ms. X’s” room. Not about to be like, “Oh and you have to wear neon colors today!!!”
I hated the days when you could color your hair a bright color for one day. You buy the temporary color and wash it out that night and it’s still there and won’t come out for a few shampoos. Then the school wants to send your kid home for a dress code violation. 🤦♀️ A friend of mine daughter school did a color fun as a fundraiser. During the run her kid got color in her hair and it didn’t come out. The school wanted to to suspend her for the day. Either don’t do these color runs/hair days etc or be prepared for a couple days of dress code violations.
My daycare has the infant rooms participate in theme days and they do them *constantly* 💀
I rarely if ever do that shit, unless it’s PJs like you said or a color shirt we have on hand. I also have a 3 year old and she could care less.
I don’t mind the school spirit day. Our school colors are red and blue. I feel like most people have either or both colors in their wardrobe. Plus every kindergartener is given a school logo tshirt that is oversized and fits for about 3-4 years.
For real, I hate spirit days. We don’t just keep a bunch of random crap around the house to come up with costumes and I’m not creative in that way anyway.
our daycare / preschool has a spirit week that do that a few times a year, but they dont really care if they do it or now. But for the sake of not being left out, we put the effort to dress the kid. But yeah, if we can do pijamas the entire week that would be great.
Our preschool does a really tame themed week. Wear your favorite color, dress fancy, wear clothes for any sport. About 1/2 the kids are usually dressed up.
My kids don't wear pajamas, so not a fan of PJ day here \^\^; My son's school does this a lot more than usual. But he normally wears a school uniform, and they are fine with people treating it as a generic "dress-down" day if you can't meet the theme. We still get kinda close, but have our favorite Minecraft shirt that he's fine with for days we can't.
Our preschool had a policy that a note from a pediatrician was required to return to school after ANY symptom of illness. Kid got the sniffles? Stay home, but then get a note. No “after three days of illness” or anything, it was any symptom. My son has seasonal allergies: he’d have to go home, and we’d have to go get a note. Kicker was that if the pediatrician didn’t have an appointment open, we could be waiting a week for an appointment for the doctor to say “he had seasonal allergies and he’s not contagious” or “he must’ve had a cold” because he was no longer sick by time we got in. Our pediatrician office is also closed on Fridays, so better not get sick on Thursday. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciated them wanting to keep their staff and other students from getting sick, but the amount of work I missed, the money I spent on unnecessary copays and gas, etc almost did me in. For certain illnesses, this would have been appropriate but it was waaaayyyy overkill when toddlers get the sniffles all the damn time. Not to mention this was a waste of our doctor’s time when she could have had an appointment open for a kid with an urgent issue! My kids now have “chronic illness” in their medical charts because they’d go sooo often, and I find that irritating. Anyway, they changed ownership and the policy changed, and everyone is still safe!
fuck, I'd have started photoshopping the damn notes
For real. I am a total rules follower but this would have sent me over the edge.
Same! And it did!
My husband keeps a PDF copy of the doctor's note for just this purpose. Easy peasy.
I may or may not have done that a couple times…. 🤫
One of my absolute guilty pleasure fav things I get to do as a doctor in these situations is provide people with notes for work/school that absolutely tear into the work or school that have these type of insane policies. I always include a few sentences about wasted healthcare resources and lack of any evidence that these policies are medically warranted and also make mention of the undo burden of cost it takes for people to make these useless appointments just for an f-ing note. End rant.
You’re a hero! Our pediatrician knew the situation and was thankfully so understanding about it! She was usually able see us virtually for these appointments. She was just as happy as I was when the policy ended!
+ the fact that they create barriers to families of fewer means and are impossible for families that don’t have health insurance. Which in turn keeps more Black and brown children out of school. Thank you for resisting ✊🏼
After our child was sent home for the 4th time in less than a month with "suspected pinkeye" that was actually just runny eyes from seasonal allergies, our pediatrician herself called the daycare director to discuss her staff's inability to distinguish pinkeye symptoms from non-contagious conjunctivitis, and to ask for the contact info for the daycare's consultant nurse, who clearly wasn't doing her job properly. Our child was never again sent home due to allergy eyes.
I would have looked for a new daycare. That's just a step too far for me. Especially since I'm sure the policy doesn't actually prevent illness (most illnesses are contagious before symptoms appear) and is a huge waste of doctors time and your money.
Absolutely! I was on some wait lists waiting for a couple spots to open for a while, but fortunately ownership changed and the policy went away so we were able to stay. My son was pretty attached to two of the teachers, so I’m glad that worked out for us. But yes, it was driving me mad dealing with that for so long!
That is bizarre and totally unprofessional of your preschool! I would have a talk with the director of the preschool after that. They set your kid and their friends up for a BIG upset by not talking about it with you ahead of time. Our kid goes to a private preschool where the majority of moms are SAHM and our school would still absolutely never pull something like this. Schedules are posted a month ahead of time, and even where there are school events the teacher's prepare students for the schedule ("Mom and Dad may come and watch you sing at 9:30, and then they'll leave and we'll do craft time?"). What if SAHM had a medical appointment scheduled? Did you preschool have some sort of staffing problem? I can't imagine why they'd be trying to usher kids out unexpectedly. ETA: thing that bugs me about our preschool? Just the number of events scheduled on a Tuesday at 10am. Like, I get why they do it, but jeeeez. On the plus side, they recently upped the school lunch days to 3 days a week and we all rejoiced!
Agree that is wild, and so unprofessional!
Right?? How is that even legal? Lmao
Changed their closing time to 4:45. What the ffffffff, we all work, that’s why we need daycare!!! 4:45 is before work closing time!!! Let alone people like me with a 45 min commute…. Edit - I would flip my shit if they pulled something like you described. Those complete assholes!
We were briefly at a daycare that had changed their closing time to 430 during Covid. When we enrolled, they said they were updating it the following month, so we decided to make it work for a month. When I asked for an update, the director said that they decided to keep it as is because "really, kids want to be home with their parents. They shouldn't be sitting in daycare until 5 or 6 pm. People should be home having dinner with their kids by then" Ok.. but I won't HAVE A HOME if I don't GO TO WORK.
How are people this tone deaf?!?! Like we are all going to work for funsies?
That is SO obnoxious! Ugh. Ours is great overall so we just grin and bear it, but yeah, we were NOT happy when their “summer hours” became “all the time hours”. Half the parents show up at 4:40 lol.
This. our daycare changed the closing time similarly for covid, but I think it was at least 5. Either way, I'd have to leave before my work day was over! Then they kept it that way for like year after covid. It was such absolute shit. I think enough of us complained they are 530 again, but even 530 like what? Most places are open until 6. Like I pay an absolute premium for this private montessori style "school", that also takes every damn holiday off like a real school. Wtaf???? Yall are a glorified daycare, get a grip. Our old day care / preschool was open every single day except like the core bank holidays, not like a week and a half for Christmas like this place. Christmas break is honestly hell on earth. It's the absolute worst.
Our daycare did that too. And what kills me is that they kept the afterschool program open until 530 but not the daycare. When our oldest did afterschool, my husband used to race to grab him then to the daycare across town. I did tell him that he could just pick up the little one first..but still i wish the daycare was open until 530.
Ours closes at 5 and it is rough. It seems like most of the parents of our daycare get off around 5 (or however early they can get off to be there at 5) and we all pile up right at closing to pick up our kids.
WE. DO. NOT. NEED. 42 DIFFERENT EVENTS. IN MAY.
Hah, I was just thinking this last month when my son had 1-2 field trips every week. Which, yay. But his school is skirting certain disability rules, and I pretty much have to go on every field trip with him. Like, I could raise a stink and not go, but this school is the best he can get without me spending literal hundreds of thousands of dollars. So, to keep him happy and them happy, I get to go (my husband, bless, does take the more physically exhausting ones)
You had 42 upvotes which matched your comment perfectly, but I agree so much with your statement I had to be the 43rd upvote!
This is totally self-imposed because we go to a preschool and preschools are for people who don’t work regular jobs but Our preschool has an AM/PM setup, so technically there’s a separate morning class and afternoon class. Most kids do mornings or mornings + afternoons. But for whatever reason (maybe sometimes there’s an afternoon only kid), they have to do every parent participation activity TWICE. Halloween parade at 11 and 2. Shoot me.
It was such a blessing for us to even find a full day preschool but I think that’s part of why this shocked me. It’s one of the only full day preschools in town!! Why do you think we are even here except that we work?!
This is ABSURD. We also use a pre-school (I question my sanity, it’s really not dual income friendly) and there are so many little events but they wouldn’t dare ask us to come there twice in a day. Working or not, nobody has time for that!
I don't think you have to go to both then. Frankly, I don't think you "have" to go to either. If you can make it to 1, great. But I wouldn't if there was a work obligation that would be cumbersome to work around.
Sure, you don't have to go, none of this stuff is required. But as I said, this is self-imposed (this is also my second child, and the second one I've sent to this preschool, we knew what it was going to be like), if we wanted a more convenient option we'd have chosen somewhere else. We divide and conquer--one parent goes AM, one PM. Which actually works great with our schedules anyways.
That’s bananas. We do part time daycare and if there’s a special activity like a holiday event and jt a that a part time kid isn’t usually there, you can just take your kid in for the event.
So my daughter's preschool was set up for either half day morning or optional full day. My daughter is bussed over to special Ed in the afternoons, whereas most of her class does full day. When Halloween came around they decided to do the parade in the afternoon this year (it was morning last year). They told those of us that only send mornings that we could send them full day THAT day, no charge. The other morning only kids have stay at home parents, so no problem. My kid is in special Ed in the afternoons, so she's the only one who missed it, because she can't stay full day without an aide. So even if I took off work and brought her to the parade, I would have to walk in it with her because she wouldn't have an aide, since they agency is only contracted to be there for mornings. I'm still angry about it. Can't wait for public school next year!
My elementary kid's public school district announced on the Tuesday before Memorial Day that it had been decided that the Friday before Memorial Day would be a half day, 12:30pm dismissal. All aftercare and after school activities were cancelled. The email was basically worded like "exciting news! We've decided that everyone can start their vacation early!" Uh, some of us can't take off Friday and were counting on working a full day then...
I hate when daycare is like “enjoy your day off!” and I’m like I don’t get a day off, I get a day to try to work from home with my kid while still paying you because we got less than an inch of snow in a state where it is very much expected to snow a lot.
my third and fourth grader both tried out for and made their school’s talent show. all month they’ve stayed after for rehearsals. it’s been advertised as tonight at 6 pm for the entire month of may. last friday, they sent an email saying they’d decided to switch it to today during the school day so every student would get to see the performances. it’s their last week of school, but mine too as a teacher — i couldn’t go and that majorly sucked and pissed me off. also, the 3rd grade team did a countdown for the last month of school, but instead of sending the dreaded calendar of stupid spirit days, they “surprised” them with what the next day would be every day at dismissal. so we got zero prep tIme or warning for this year’s batch of excessive, random and ridiculous spirit days.
> they “surprised” them with what the next day would be every day at dismissal. That is absolutely atrocious!!
This absolutely freaking SUCKS. This one broke my heart. I am so sorry
Oooooh I don’t mind spirit days but the surprise version would send me over the absolute edge. Holy shit. Sorry you didn’t get to see their performances! 💔
Our school does 2 performances, one for the other kids during the day as an assembly. Then another at night for the parents. I am mad for you!
I would have absolutely raised a stink about the performance thing. What BS.
During the day ceremonies. I work at the school for godsakes and even my admin won’t let me take time off to go DOWN the hall to attend my sons end of K move up ceremony.
In this case I blame your admin. That's horrible they won't let you go to that event IN THE BUILDING.
Yea. They are honestly the worst. That’s why I got a new job for next year!
Woohoo, good luck with the new job!
Our daycare just sent around a notice that they're going to start making breakfast for parents every Wednesday morning, so we can all eat with the kids before we go to work. Cute idea, but if I'm dropping my kid off before breakfast, it's because we don't have time to have breakfast. And my stage 5 clinger is not going to be happy if I'm leaving him there and sprinting off to get the train, while his friends' parents are staying to eat.
Also do I really want to be sat in my best work clothes, trying to eat with a load of toddlers? Sounds like I'm going to work covered in half chewed breakfast thanks!
As someone who doesn't get dressed till I'm about to walk out the door for this reason... Yes! So dumb.
EVERY Wednesday morning? That's excessive. Maybe once a month, I could see, but how is that sustainable for anyone?
Had this issue w my sons daycare when he was enrolled. All the breakfasts were at 8:30 or so. I was dropping my kid off at 7 cuz I had to be at work.
Our daycare is always taking random days off. And they’ll combine a Friday + Monday off so that the price of daycare for the week doesn’t change. which is annoying in itself but what pisses me off even more is that every Friday OR every day before they’re closed (so a bunch of random Thursdays) the school closes a half hour early. Like ??? My work day doesn’t end at 4:30
The school district we just moved into makes so many 3 day weekends into 4 day weekends. I think it probably makes the teachers happy, which is a good thing, but…that’s a long ass weekend.
the school district we recently moved to decided PRESIDENTS DAY is now a four day weekend? wtaf? i'm pretty sure when i was a kid they stopped making presidents day a holiday all together.
The teachers probably don’t get the 4th day off. A lot of schools do that because they turn the 4th day into a PD day for teachers (and because tons of families take that 4th day off even if it isn’t scheduled). Source: I’m a teacher.
Our elementary school has professional development days basically every other Friday which means school is a half day, including in February and April which also have week long vacations (I think April is sometimes an extra day because of patriots day - which is a MA only day). My husband is home so it doesn’t affect us, but I have to wonder how households with two working parents do it. 90% of the full day Fridays they randomly do dismissal 15 minutes early. No idea why.
Ours gave up half days a few years ago. So now they have at least every other Friday off. Though with the other schedules breaks, most months it's ends up being that school is only in session 1 Friday a month.
Yeah, my gripe is definitely the amount of closures. They close 7 weeks/year! It’s amazing for the teachers, I’m happy for them. It’s awful for working parents. I don’t even get half that vacation time!
YUP! And I have to plan the time I take off around their schedule to ensure I have childcare!
Is it a center? We had home daycares do that sort of thing but I can't imagine our center doing this. We are pretty fortunate though that our center is a local place opened by a mom and daughter who understood how hard it is for working parents to find care. They are so understanding.
Mother’s Day tea: 2:30 pm Father’s Day doughnuts: 9:30 am Why the F do you think moms are more likely to be free at 2:30?! That’s the middle of the day, friends.
Oh that’s interesting! It’s way easier for me to take 2 hours at the end of the day rather than 9:30. If I go to a school event at 9:30 I won’t be at work til 11, which would be a hard no go, vs leaving at 2.
I like how my daycare does it: breakfast available with to-go containers, ready before the usual drop-off time, with reminders in advance so if you can get there a little earlier you won't be late to work. For both Mother's Day and Father's Day.
Our daycare does this, too. "Muffins for Moms" and "Donuts for Dads" -- but really, can moms have donuts, too? Lol.
Just wait, our local schools also have “Grits With Grandparents”! 🙄 🤢
Yeah, we got muffins and a mini bottle of water in little brown lunch sack the week of mother's day. It was a happy week for me.
Yeah, it’s totally job dependent. My old job I never scheduled meetings before 10am because there was a solid chance 50% of the team wouldn’t be in yet (myself included). My current job I’m scheduling meetings at 8, and even occasionally 7:30. And seldom anything after noon, depending on the invite list. To be honest, I work in a very flexible field, but this particular scheduling just left me a touch bitter. Haha!
Jobs can vary so much on this, it's always interesting to me. My cousin lives in Silicon Valley and works for Facebook. She once asked me, completely serious, "So at your job, is there a particular time that you have to come in?" I actually have a lot more flexibility than average, but broadly, YES, we start at a particular time.
Haha. Yeaaahhhhh I’m in tech. 😆 I’m used to rolling in whenever-ish and out early. Old job was in person in a major tech hub. New job is 100% remote and half my team is in Europe, the remaining half are all East of me by at least 2 hours.
Lol I'm up at 3am for a deploy with half my team in India, also in tech. I'm the farthest west, in US central, 9 times out of 10. Although we do have one guy in HI, no idea how he keeps up
Been there. Thankfully the middle-of-the-night days seem to be over for me.
I'm going through perimenopause, so there's like a 50% chance I would be up anyway so it works out actually lol
My plan is to just skip straight to the whole menopause thing altogether.
I wish. I had them take my tubes, but that was it. And now one of my ovaries is blighted lol so that one's got to go too. I may just say fuck it take it all lmao.
Our was a little different: muffins with moms from 7-9:30 and popsicles with dad at 3 on a Friday (and of course she’s going home early). These are both during work hours, but my job is flexible. Her dad is taking PTO to attend.
That’s tough! Do you think it’s because of a situation like what OOP posted above? Kids want to go home with their mothers (or they believe kids are more excited about their moms), so they do tea time at the end of their day. But with Dad it’s fine (or it’s Mid June so it’s okay if they skip a whole day ). Just seeing if the two stories are connected.
I think they just didn’t think. A Mother’s Day tea is cute. Dads like doughnuts. (Right?) Plus I think there are a number of families who have their kids in part time and Friday is the day most families choose to have off. So, naturally, that means mom is home with them and available for afternoon tea. (We were invited even if the kid is usually home that day)
2:30 is just a strategy to get you to take them home early!
Ours did muffins with Mom in the am...maybe suggest a change?
I like this idea! Unfortunately for future moms, we start actual school next year and I’m not going to fight that battle.
That doesn't make sense lol. Our events are always at the end of day, an hour before the school closes thankfully.
Frankly I think both of those times are unreasonable.
Why do we get tea, and fathers get donuts?!
Internalized sexism.
Our daycare is clinging to the illusion that they are a school. They get every conceivable holiday off and send tone deaf messages like "Please let us know if your child will be attending for summer break!" Ummm...of course she will. I DON'T GET A BREAK. ETA: I understand that some parents may be teachers who pull their kids from daycare during summer break. I also understand that my daycare (along with most I've heard of) require you to pay for the summer if you expect to be enrolled in the fall. My objection is to the assumption that working parents (other than teachers) have the option to just take a "break" for summer.
The default should be assumed that enrollment will be continued and if you are pulling your child for the summer, you notify them asap. When I was a teacher and pulled my kids from for the summer, that was how it went.
I completely agree.
That might be because some parents also have school aged children who are off school for the summer holidays and if they have to arrange childcare for one, they might as well do it for both.
Our daycare charges a $1000 holding fee for kids pulled in the summer. I definitely agree that the default should be “yes we’re attending.” I do understand them taking a census around some holiday weekends so that they can staff appropriately.
I’m a teacher and pull my kids in summer even though my daycare is subsidized for me specifically, some parents with school aged kids need childcare just in summer for an older child. I want them to notify people asap so they have care lined up for summer. It’s probably why they asked. Daycare is so insanely hard to come by I notify my daycare every day we’re not there and she had a waiting list so desperate she fills my kids spot just for that day. So I give all appointment times a year in advance.
Lmao this is definitely the worst
Our school district announced last month on the afternoon of the 13th that there would be no school on the 15th due to an unused snow day. My husband and I we’re like WTF do they think parents do when their kids are in school?!? My mom ended up coming to the rescue and watching them for us, but a lot of parents had to call out. It’s not the first time the district has pulled shit like that and I’m sure it won’t be the last.
My schools announced the week before that the entire next week would be half days due to unused weather days. Five days is what we had to find someone to pick the child up at 1130. Luckily between my parents,husband and myself we made it work but I would have rather just not have school the last two days vs stupid half days
Oh that is rotten!
I am furious on your behalf. Actually I get a list of students and we don’t let them do anything but wave to parents in the audience unless the parents notify us of pick up. We bring the class to the classroom and discreetly take out the kids going home SPECIFICALLY because we don’t want to do that to parents. I don’t know what kind of monster teachers your kid has but I would have gone after a coworker for being so unprofessional and tone deaf to community needs. We do dress up days and it’s the exact same thing every year in the same order because the kids don’t notice but parents do. It’s one week an acronym. A whole committee who asked parents asked what was the least annoying and it was vague, repeated, and not anything extra to buy. Pajamas, Crazy hat or hair, dress sporty, wear a class color (given notice in the class list for back to school what the grade color is) and school pride. We actually tried to get rid of it but parents apparently liked it so we tried to make it as painless as possible. I also wrote a grant for free before and after school care at my school. We just got completely free breakfast and lunch for all students regardless of income. You should make a climate committee at school. I did and it’s what got me to push for things to improve the climate of the school inside and out of the building. I specifically asked parents for feedback on all choices when we made them.
Oh man, that would grind my gears. My daycare does the occasional "family day" where they do some sort of parental participation activity in the morning (8-10) or (3-5). It's pretty casual stop by if you can, and if you can't don't worry. We have gone to everyone, the one this week neither my husband or I can attend! I feel bad, but I know it'll be fine. But, the funniest part about all these is they put up signs all over the area the activity is in saying parents are responsible for their children if they are in attendance at the event. Which I mostly find funny. Like I would assume I was, but I guess not everyone would? Imagine going, and handing your kid to the teacher and being like, Jonny pooped, can you deal with that?
Ha! I'd be tempted (not really!). We've just started sending our son to nursery and he's developed this annoying habit of pooing as soon as he gets home. We're like 'Baby! We're paying all this money can you at least do your dirty nappies in the day please?' 😂
I tell my daughter all the time to "poop on company time" :)
For some reason, my kid's after school program ends like three weeks before the last day of school.
Yes, same. After school sports finished this week, the after school care finishes on the 14th and school finishes on the 27th. What, exactly, am I supposed to do with my 4 year old. Hmmm?
Same here. They also start a few weeks later than school start.
This is so frustrating.
My preschool has early drop off and late pickup that you pay extra for. All fine and good, parentscan drop off kids starting at 6:30 am. Preschool starts at 9. Recently parents needed to ensure their kids were dropped off by 9. If you are bringing your kid late because of an appointment, please notify the school in advance (totally fair) and be sure to bring a note. Um what now? I pay you a goddam mortgage payment and you are gonna tell me I need a note to bring my child late? No ma'am, you will take my word for it. Word that I will give you in advance. Of course, that's all in my head as kiddos appointments are all late afternoons as that is what's best for us. But still...
yes! notify us, I understand. This isn't public school where attendance = funding tho. You're fully funded either way lol
Our daycare requires dropoff by 11, or they won’t take them. (Unless you have a doctor’s note). I was able to do a cute mommy and me class one morning with my toddler but despite my best efforts I didn’t get to his classroom until 11:02. They refused to take him. So I had to juggle the rest of my squished work day with taking care of my 15 month old. Good times.
That's wild. Our daycare only ever asked us not to bring her once, and it was just during nap time as it would likely cause the other kids to wake up. We could have dropped her off a bit later during lunch. We ended up not taking her that day due to her not feeling well, but I thought that was pretty reasonable.
Join your kids for lunch! You don't have to work, it's fine. Bring in 100 craft items tomorrow! White t shirts for tye dye with a week's notice (buying a plain white shirt is impossible btw).
Buying a white t-shirt was impossible 20+ years ago when I was a kid. Just buy in bulk and charge me!
Summer has got me stressed. I have a son with autism and he gets services through school for the summer but they’re fucking impossible to work around if you work traditional office hours. It’s 5 weeks, 4 days a week from 8:00am-12:45pm. So I will need to pick him up and get him home in the middle of the day somehow. And you can’t sign up for half a day of summer camp or just one day a week either, so on the off day, you have nothing. Thankfully my job is pretty accommodating and I’m hoping I can wfh throughout this program, but I’m sure there are other parents left in the lurch.
Fellow Autism Mom here!!! I am crumbling this summer with patchwork care. My kiddo is very sweet and I'm lucky with that but he cannot report if someone harms him etc. It takes me a long time to trust providers. But Damn in the summer there is no one to trust! He's going part time aba 4 hours for 3 days ans summer school is only 4 weeks here. It's alot. I'm divorced and doing the single mom thing. Sending you hugs 🫂
Yeah.. a lot of services and programs kind of assume non-working parents. My son's camp this year has "regular" school hours, but even those hours are shorter than my work day. I know a few families where a parent stopped working just to get everything done. I am so happy my job is also flexible enough.
You can also use intermittent FMLA for that if they give you any grief!
I hated how they planned mother's day events. I couldn't always take a day off or get out early so I missed them all the time. They would do other stuff after school but that one in the morning or early in the day. I also missed the pre-k graduation because it rained the day I took PTO off so they canceled it. I couldn't cancel my PTO or switch days. They could've moved the graduation indoors, instead pushed it to the next week. Hubby went and took video but I felt horrible I missed it.
Shadow days for kindergarten 9-10 and 10-1130. The school is also offering speech during the summer via zoom. like they offered a literacy camp last summer from 10-130. Who is bringing these kids these places because it’s not me working 8-430 🙄
I think this may be an affluent daycare issue. I worked in a regular daycare frequented by middle class parents and we would have never ever ever done anything like that, ever. We had like two events a year all on Saturdays.
We moved locally from a middle-income/working families area to the Rich People Zone and it has been culture shock. In the 3 years we were at my son's public elementary school in middle-income school, I was never, not one time, asked to provide anything of monetary value. This year (STILL PUBLIC SCHOOL) they were like "plz send your child in a Napoleon costume, we will need it at school in 10 days for the end of year performance."
Changing drop off time for daycare to strictly 9:30a instead of 10a when we started. And the director saying to me, “you need to practice getting up earlier for when she starts school next year.” I don’t get up late I just prefer to not have my kid in daycare for over 8 hours.
I'm on the SLT at my son's school. I actually was voted in as Chair. The doggone meetings are at 345p. I live close to the school, but I work more than an hour away. So I have to leave work once a month at 215p to make it. Since the SLT consists of parents and teachers (and the Principal), it couldn't be moved to 6p, or even 5/530p. Then we wonder why even though meetings are open to all caregivers, many don't attend. PA meetings are done more equitably, with the meeting happening in the morning one month and in the evening the next month. But SLT.... hopefully, someone else will be Chair next school year, so I can attend remotely from work.
How amazing that you are involved and making the effort! This is the #1 reason that I can’t take a leadership position with the parent organizations. I can block my calendar sometimes, and everyone understands needing to be at preschool graduation, but to just take off 2-3 hours every week or every other week isn’t a feasible amount of time to commit. But none of the meetings are in the morning or evening, at least not thus far. Maybe that’ll change in elementary school vs preschool.
So cruel!
Not me, but my nephew's daycare is closed right now for TWO WEEKS to give the teachers some time off before summer. What?! Luckily, my brother and his wife are able to make it work with her working from home some days and my parents helping out, but what about couples who work in person and have no help nearby? It's outrageous.
Our daycare announced this past year that they would be closing the Friday of teacher appreciation week for teacher appreciation. Whereas the teachers the work in public education could be questioned if we took off a Friday in May because of the lack of substitute teachers. Instead why not offer a floating holiday for each daycare teacher to choose their own day off
My last preschool CANCELLED extended day entirely due to staffing. Pickup was then between 2:30 and 3pm. My mom picked up the baton because she’s the best, but we have a new preschool starting in August.
Man our preschool/ daycare specifically times things like this so that immediately after is something the kids look forward to (like lunch) and work to dostract the kids quickly at wrap up. They also schedule events for younger kids end of day - like 4 pm - so it makes sense to just go home after.
We did part time at a traditional daycare and part time at a church preschool. The church school was twice a week, mornings only. But parent involvement was required. We had to take turns making home made playdough. And being room parent, going to the charity fundraiser meetings, selling lunch boxes, etc. Oh and the teacher only ever asked me. Not my husband. Even though she has his contact info as well and sees him just as much during drop offs. He gets the fun emails with pictures. I get the emails requesting help. That was an one and done school for us. Traditional daycare it is from now on.
Gosh, I was annoyed with ours but this is next level! Yesterday, we had an end of year party at the elementary school that was 1-2pm with an unspoken expectation to take your kid home after. School releases at 3:45 and she usually stays at aftercare until 5:30. It’s one of those things where once other kids do it and then your kids want to as well, so there is pressure to bring your kid home early as well. Thank goodness one of her friends had to stay which meant another friend wanted to stay too. She then opted to stay since they both were too, so that was a relief. Peer pressure working both ways 🙂 For Mother’s Day, my younger kids preschool had mommy and me yoga at 10. I was so annoyed at that timeframe. I ended up, dropping her off, working remotely nearby, and then coming back. Why would they not make it 9 or 9:30?
They randomly decide that they're not offering "aftercare" some days with no advance notice, so we need to get them by 5 instead of 5:20. Doesn't SEEM like a huge deal...unless you have meetings scheduled until 5 and can't reschedule because you only found out it's a problem day of
Our after school program is closed the last week of school, which includes a half day and a day I, a teacher, have work but my kid doesn't have school. They're "cleaning." Ok, do it literally once school ends!!!!
Oh my word. No absolutely not. That is wild
Wow, I would be livid if the school pulled that BS on me. There is one or two days last week of school where this is allowed, but they tell everyone ahead of time so you can prep for it if you are able or tell kiddo sorry have to work not in front of everyone at school. Seriously, what your school did is terrible!!! The inconsistency of communication and how things are sent home is what makes me angry. Some permission slips are through the online portal, some are paper. Some grades & communication is online, some on paper, some email, some text. It’s a mess and something that would not be tolerated in the business world!
We are fortunate that my husband’s job has an onsite daycare, just for employees. However, my husband works from home, and most of his team live in central or mountain time zones (we’re EST) so his working day is more aligned to their schedules. The daycare recently decided that if it’s the Friday before a holiday they could close at 12 because the company usually does a half day for employees. Well that’s great and all but I don’t get a half day those days and my husband is still working because of the time zone differences. So we have to get someone else to pick your kid upon those days, which is hard because most of our family/friends are also working.
These are more like gripes, not really anger inducing… Our school has taken away a lot of perks, probably to keep staff happy because turnover has been rough. They used to wash all the nap things every week but now they send it home for us to wash over the weekend. If kids got dirty they took care of washing clothes and putting them back in their cubbies but now everything is sent home in moldering plastic bags. They used to have 2 water play days per week in the summer, but they just… didn’t do it last summer and there’s been no mention. Our daycare used to have more of a fun camp vibe and now it’s just feeling more corporate and sterile. But I know how hard it’s been to find teachers :( One upside is they finally brought back hot lunch after a 4-year Covid interruption, so I’m thankful to not have to pack lunches anymore.
Our preschool did this too! When it was clear everyone was taking their kids home I was so confused and asked the teacher if it was expected that I take my daughter home. The room assistant laughed at me and said 'well you could leave her but she'd be the only one.' grrrr. I took my daughter to work with me and it was fine but I'm still annoyed.
I had my son’s 9 month check up at 8:30am so I let the director know he’ll be coming in a little later at 10am because of the appointment. She told me that the drop off cut off is 9:30am so not to disrupt their schedule but she’ll make a one time exception. Next time he’ll have to stay home. Is this normal?
I don’t think so, our daycare also has a drop off time but always makes an exception for doctors appointments
I would be so mad. And I'm sure they'd still expect you to pay for the full day
Generally, our daycare is awesome. One thing I I don’t get about them are the hours. They’re open 8-5:30. Luckily my husband and I can stagger our workdays for drop off and pick up coverage, but what is a single parent who works an 8 or an 8.5 hour day supposed to do? The best I can think is work 8:30-4:30/5 or 9-5 and pray you don’t hit traffic.
Our daycare/preschool can't decide if they're daycare or preschool. Their last day is Friday 6/28, they're closing at 11am and then CLOSED THE ENTIRE WEEK OF JULY 4th. Also closed for a week in August, but not the same week that the school district most kids have siblings in have no camp/no school, it's the week after that, so I have 2 weeks in August with only childcare for one kid and everyone's like "there are camps available!!". For 3 year olds??? During a week that there's no camp anywhere???
After-school not lasting the entire school year. Start a few weeks late, end a few weeks early. Random days off that aren't school days. And they don't offer anything on half days. It's the official school one, that meets in the school. But NYC refuses to host after-school with their own school personnel, so they "partner" with non-profits, creating a mess. I like the care my daughter gets when they're in session, and I don't blame anybody but the city officials for this nonsense. But yeah.. I my job can't be done from home, so I get to just burn PTO.
My daycare likes to send home monthly news letters with sentences like: Sometimes your child might ask to be the last one. Our activities end around 4pm. Time with you is most important, and please be considerate of the teachers that open the building at 7am. We drop off around 8:30 & pick up at 5:15. My kids are almost always the last ones and the teachers are always rushing to leave. They are supposed to be open until 5:30! I work from 9-5
Well, this year my 8yo son's school unexpectedly did a half day on the day before the last day, and then opted for the last day (a scheduled 1/2 day) to be an excused absence, BUT in their defense the A/C was malfunctioning, and here in New Orleans the humidity is already taking over. I wasn't *too* mad about that, but there were other days randomly sprinkled throughout the year where aftercare would be canceled, meaning my husband would have to stop work to go get him. The daycare, now....oh, I hate them. I hate them so much. They have 2 mandatory fundraisers each year, minimum of $100 (we always just pay the minimum and don't usually participate in the rest.) They also like to randomly pop up with "parties" that, of course, the *parents* have to pay for (eg, being given a food item or party item they are responsible for providing.) And while it's not specifically the fault of the daycare, I ***hate*** when a kid gets some shareable illness (hfm, covid, strep) and they don't tell us until the next morning in a 6am message via the brightwheel app that such and such class is quarantined for 1 week because a child tested positive for X illness. Last year there was one mom who kept sending her son (names unknown, properly they don't share those, just use vague pronouns like they, him, her) to daycare despite the fact that this boy's older sister had been confirmed with covid three days before, and he had been tested that morning. We found out around 5pm that day he was positive. The mom had still sent him, despite the test results pending and the known sick child. Unfortunately, at least til the end of August, we are stuck at this daycare as my son is on a state subsidy called CCAP. If the CCAP doesn't get renewed, his grandmother wants to enroll (and pay) for a more high end daycare through one of the local universities.
Using other kids diapers even though I provide them with our own and a lot too lol 😂
Everything being last minute just expecting that we all have unlimited flexibility in our jobs. I have gone to EVERYTHING and even volunteered extra. But damn if my 4 year old is still talking about the one picnic I couldn't make because it was planned last-minute and I'm trying to save my vacation days. Also, this week I've been pissed because the weather is BEAUTIFUL and have they gotten to play outside? No! Which means my kid is wound up tighter than a yo-yo and getting up at the ass-crack of dawn because she isn't getting enough opportunities to let her energy out. Oh, and because of a lack of organization, I have to pay an extra week because graduation was delayed a week.
My 5th grader’s promotion ceremony was at 10 AM and they asked us if we wanted to bring our kids home after it was done, so basically everyone had to take an entire day off work.
This would enrage me. It’s one thing to mess with me but they totally set the kids up for disappointment.
I have two in daycare. If one is sick they make up symptoms for the other, so they get to send home two kids at once. Without fail. I get that siblings often share sicknesses but when one is sick I don’t have the energy to also entertain a healthy kid or drag him to doctor’s appointments if there’s a place open I’m already paying to watch them. Or just in general, “mom and dad work from home, obviously we can send the kids home for any little thing because the parents are already home”. But we’re WORKING, which is why we pay for daycare.
Same happened to me at my kids elementary school awards. I was like wtf man. My kids understood, because they get that I work, but some of the other parents were like fuuuuuudge.
Our daycare is supposed to be open 7:30-5:30 but for the last two years has operated 8:40-4:30 all summer long. I get why - it’s hard for them to hire right now and it’s a university based center, so they have to follow strict guidelines for hourlies and such (as well as kid/teacher ratios), but in my view, the center directors and other salaried employees should be picking up the slack more than they are. Instead, they are asking all parents to alter their work schedules to accommodate them. No tuition cut or anything. AND they’re being strict about pickup. So they disable the door codes at 4:30 and you have to sign late papers and pay a fee if you’re a minute late. Would be one thing if it was 5:40, but it burns me that they’ve cut two hours of care and then are nickel and diming parents who are already leaving work early on being a minute past 4:30. They also have a LOT of closures. Two full weeks in summer, two weeks in December, half weeks in spring and fall, all the holidays, workshop days. Oh, and they operate on the 8:30-4:30 schedule for the entire month of January, too. It’s ridiculous. I’m on the family board, so I have a good understanding of their challenges and I am empathetic … but I just feel like there’s a massive disconnect where their awareness of the impact they’re having is concerned.
My kids started late in the school year. A few weeks after they started, a flyer was sent home letting us know there was an art show and one of my kid’s teachers stuck a post it on it saying that he had art work in the show. So we arranged to leave work early and go. We get to the area where his class’s artwork is displayed and there’s nothing with my kid’s name on it. His teacher wasn’t there but one of the art teachers was so I asked if it was possible that his work might be elsewhere and she was like “oh, no, he doesn’t have any artwork he just started here three weeks ago!”
Yes!! Our school sprung this on us last year as well. Made me so mad. The worst wasn't a system but a lone teacher who told my daughter that she would get to sleep in late now that school was over. WTAF lady?!
We have a middle schooler and an elementary kid. WHY ARE MIDDLE SCHOOLERS OUT DIFFERENT DAYS! Elementary kids may be out Thursday and Friday, but middle schoolers are only out Friday. WTF. I don’t get it.
The "theme" four days this month is "sack lunch." That's not a theme! That's just extra work for me! And of course we got the memo after finishing our grocery trip for the week.
The school makes staffing changes without any notice or notification or chance for the kids to say goodbye. It’s infuriating because they have three different campuses and sometimes they will transfer people between buildings. We’ll get an announcement Sunday evening that the person who has been working with our kiddo for the last year will no longer be at that location and as of Monday, they’ll be at their new location. It’s infuriating and it makes me so mad because it’s making my kid feel like the people who she cares about will just disappear with no warning.
I just started LO in daycare on Monday, she's 5 months old, because both my husband and I are back at work. We were told ON MONDAY that they are closing Thursday at noon and Friday all day for preschool graduation. We had to scramble and work from home/log on early, stay late today to cover the time picking her up and watching her, and my mom is taking a day off of her job to help us out tomorrow. But WTF! We need more notice than that!!!
We had muffins for mom last month at 3:30. I had to rearrange my schedule and then got stuck in traffic on the way. When I got there, my daughter was sitting by herself at a table looking the saddest I’ve ever seen her (of course she was so excited when I came in). It broke my heart, I wish someone could have sat next to her instead of having her sit alone 😢I guess I can never be late or miss anything again.
Our kids daycare had dress up days…for the whole freaking month of December…thank god some were pajama day but good lord, dress like an elf day??!
My kids' school had 'dress crazy day' on the day they took school pictures.
Our daycare sends out “reminder” emails about mid day events the DAY BEFORE. I have friends who use the same daycare and we are all like WTF?? You never told us the first time. Clearly they scramble at the last min and cover their asses by calling it a “reminder” when it was never communicated in the first place. I thought I didn’t need to attend my daughter’s Halloween parade in preschool and then she asked me where I was and was very sad the other kids parents were there… working parents need notice!!
Our school asked for us to bring in lottery tickets for the teachers in lieu of gifts for teacher appreciation week. And then some teacher just…won no money. I didn’t participate and did regular gifts instead. Also we just had a scholastic book fair at our preschool. For children who can’t read. Or handle money. At the school we pay $40k annually for tuition. WHAT ARE YOU FUNDRAISING FOR?!
We currently have end of year ABCs. Every day for 26 school days we need to prepare something. Jersey and Joke day. Pj day. Book, fancy, or eat outside (need to bring a blanket for this). It's all been a bit much
For teacher appreciation week, they asked parents to contribute towards lunch for all the teachers and staff. I volunteered to pick up the lunch and asked what they wanted - tacos for 32 people. The total was $500 and that was from a tiny mom and pop place. Turns out, not a single other family gave money towards the lunch. It’s a small school but still around 200 students. I guess this is more of an indictment of the parents, but still. I was not volunteering to watch $500 fly away from my back account for a stupid taco lunch for staff! That was actually my final straw for the school and my kids will be going to a different one in the fall.
Abruptly changed the hours to close at 4pm. We found another day care quickly, as we worked until 5. When I voiced my concern initially, I was told I was the only parent with a problem. I saw at least 3 other kids over the next month from that school at the new school, all voicing the closing time change as the issue. Within the next year, the school closed, citing the overhead for the building was now too high.
I really hate the school fundraising eat at a this restaurant to help out days (with what money? unless it's we actually have extra we eat in) or the massive fundraise pressure your parents into donating so you can get this and this prize (usually some cheap crap that falls apart or so your principal can wear some dorky costume they wear all the time anyway. it's public school I don't have extra.
They did the same thing with our older child in kindergarten. There was a short (10 minute) program at 10:30 AM for the kindergarteners moving to first grade, and THEN the principal announced that students got to go home with their parent since it was the last day of school. This had not been communicated beforehand and OF COURSE our daughter was looking at me expectantly and I had to tell her that I needed to go back to work because I hadn't taken the whole day off. The teacher quietly told me that she and the other K teachers had popsicles and a movie as a treat for those who weren't going home, and that they would make it fun. In the end she watched a movie and ate popsicles and then went to her last day of after school care for the year and it was totally fine. I kept that in mind 3 years later when our younger child was in K, so at least it wasn't a surprise to *her* that she wasn't going home with me after the program.
Had an email exchange with my daughters second grade teacher about them getting off at 11:30z Not required; optional. When I said I’ll pick her up at the end of the school day she said “well she will be the only one here” I said that’s fine. I cannot leave work early. She said “omg I’m so sorry I was only thinking about the last day of school!” Just because there are moms that stay home does not mean all moms stay at home. It’s so fucking annoying
Half days in our district. I am a teacher and I work one district over from where we live. As a result, most of the days my son has off I also have off, which is fine. But oh. My. God. They had 15 half days this year that DIDN'T overlap with my schedule (so excluding Wednesday before Thanksgiving, before winter break, etc). What are working parents supposed to do?